Articles - April, 2008

Updated Articles - April, 2008

Good Girls Gone Bad, Real Bad

Stedman Won't Give His O-Face

Mrs. C from "Happy Days": 'Memba Her?!

Will the Real Piers Morgan Please Stand Up?

PETA to Brit -- We Know You Need a Job

Audrina Tight Lipped Over New PiXXX

Neighbors to McCartney: STFU!

Woody vs. Hipsters - Oy Vey!

Paul Moves on with Manhattan Mama

Clooney in Godfather: Part IV?

Pap Makes Gigantic Fumble

Oprah Kingpin Was Mental Over Dental

Wino: WTF Happened to Her Face -- Part 2!

Mr. and Mrs. -- Still Just a (Bad) Movie

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911 Emergency: Clooney Is Eating Steak!

Mr. Q Hooks Up With Mr. XXX

Brady Wusses Out With Gisie, Again

The Ex-Husband Elephant in the Room

Wham! Common Gets Frisco Street Cred

Janice Makes an Ass Out of Herself

When Posh's Away, Becks Will Play

Guess Whose Celebuspawn This Is!

Luke, I Am Your Father

Cornell to Cook: "Billie Jean" Is Not Yours, Son!

Frozen in Time

Heidi's Pad -- Nothing But Pussies and Peckers

Did Jailers Contribute to Sean Levert's Death?

Bobby Ewing's on a Quest for Beaver

Denise Richards' Reality Blows

Britney to Rudolph - Hit Me Baby One Mo' Time

Lindsay Lohan - April 1st

This Is Why You Don't F*** with Steve Wynn!

Dorothy Hamill: 'Memba Her?!

Boy Band History: From Fug to Fuglier

Dave Navarro -- Your Questions Suck!

Mom of Former "Idol" Finalist Sings "My Way"

"Dancing" Pro Ices Yamaguchi

Priscilla's Doc -- Cry For Me, Argentina

You Decide -- Did We Go Too Far?

"Idol" Boobs Go Dollywood

King Leonidas, Meet "Dancing" King

Producer to John: Wh-Wh-Where's Our Money?

Jay Leno: I'm Sorry Gays

Bundchen or Buncha Skanks!?

He Houghs, He Puffs, He Screws Up His Neck

Seacrest's Knee -- Out!

"A.I." Contestant Cook Rushed to the Hospital

Madge -- Immaculate Collector, Ultimate Sellout?

Cook's Condition Triggered by Brother's Illness

"American Idol" Contestant Hospitalized, Released

Dang, They're Not Gonna Like This Back Home

I'll Have "Fleeing Facial Hair" for $800, Alex

Dead Singer Still Chillin'

Adnan: Driving While Douchebag

Lisa Rinna is Full of S**t!

Best. Job. Ever.

Janice: Let Me Fart in Peace

Reality Stars Are Dropping Like Flies!

Kooky Lady Rides Naked Cowboy for $10 Mil

McCain Goes Down the Drain

No Mow Lawsuit for Brandy

Nickelback Singer to Cops -- Blow Me!

Hanoi Jane Drops Barack Bomb

Sir Paul's New Chick -- A Leg Up on Heather

Rocco Gets Eddie's Sloppy Seconds

Pam Anderson's Project Poorhouse

"T" is for Tranny -- Tea is For Paps

Breaking News!!!! Prince A-Hole A-Fraud

Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers -- I Used To Be a Star

Dita Rides It Like a Choo Choo

Coach to Matt: Pros Before Hos

Hey Toots!

Affleck Goes AC (All Callate!) in DC

Teri Garr: 'Memba Her?!

Pap's Bogus Keanu Impersonation

Derek Hough Busts Out His Best C3PO

Elizabeth Berkley -- You Don't Know S**t!

McGowan's RoboPooch -- I'll Be Bark

John McCain Is Team Heidi!

Brit's Real Diet Secret? Stay 21 ... For Five Years!

Fan to Jerry -- I Screwed My Principal

Homeless Chick Bags Another Celeb

UCLA Snooping on Farrah Too?

Barry Bonds: One Hit Wonder

Seinfeld -- Flippin' Fiat Not Funny

Cops to Public: Screw You! We're Here for Brit!

Fergie: Is That a Lightsaber in Your Pocket?

Incredible Hulk, Incredibly Bad Surfer

Pesci Flips Wig Over Culkin Question

What the Hell Happened to Your Body?!

McCain Asked the FORBIDDEN -- Heidi Ho -- Q

Tranny Rapper Shanghai Surprises Lover?

Val Bertinelli: Forget Jenny, Pass the Bread!

Gummi: Same Douche, Half the Fat!

Fifth Time's a Charm -- NFL Convict Busted Again

Only a Dumbass Would Believe Lisa Rinna

Sabrina, The Baby Pimp Witch

McCain Dodges, MSNBC Anchor Oblivious

Heather Faker than Wooden Leg

Mouse Poop in Babwa's Prune Juice?

Whitney Takes "High" Road

Miley's Mom Barks to TMZ - "That's Just So Mean!"

All Fingers in Brit Case Point to TMZ!

Bertinelli -- Forget Jenny, Pass the Popovers!

Some Kind of Wonderful

"Dancing" with Bruising and Swelling

Hulk Hogan - Sunscreen Knows Best!

Naomi Campbell Busted -- Just Plane Crazy

Lea Thompson: 'Memba Her?!

Who Pissed on Eriq La Salle's Paella?

Matt Escapes Long Arm of Law: Free To Bong

K-Fed Shows His Big Tip

Whoever Smelt It Dealt It

"Bachelor" & Trump's Has-Been Storm the Beach

Anne H's BF Busted -- Check Mate!

Danity Kane - Toe Jammin' in Vegas

Paula Abdul -- Forever Your Slurry Girl

Greasy Smarter Than the Average Bear?

Obama to Cigs: I Wish I Knew How to Quit You

K-Fed Lives on Booze, Burgers and Big 5

Busta Is Finger Lickin' Good

Ex to 50 -- I'm Squattin' in Da House!

What Happens In Vegas Stays On K-Fed's AMEX

You're Froggin' Kidding?!!

Cruise Not Cackling About Tom-ijuana

Hold the Phones! Naomi's on the Loose!

Ashley Dupre's Star Turn

Hillary's Got Junk in the Trunk

More Mouth-to-Mouth, Please!

Forget Firecrotch: Greasy's a Racist, Homophobe

Oy Chihuahua -- Peggy Sue Got Caught Lying!

No, Nick Nolte Is Not Homeless

Trading Places -- Murphy Mix-up

Chris Between Rock and Hard Place

Joan Van Ark -- "Knot" Bad!

Alec Baldwin and Daddy's Little Girl

K-Daddy's Lawyer -- Don't Stop Believin'

America's Favorite Unwed Pregnant Teen Turns 17

Someone Owes Jenny an Apology

Candice Bergen: 'Memba Her?!

Heath Ledger Would Have Been 29 Today

Hard Candy!

Amy Winehouse Needs This Guy's Number

Paps Shoot Up Kate Moss

Val to Xtina: You Dirrty Beyatch!

Batman Impressed by Futuristic Pap Gadgetry

Columbo Mugs for Camera

Bernhard Burns TMZ Hard

Being Bill & Hill Doesn't Blow

Why We're Not Buying It -- Let Us Count the Ways

Jason Davis -- You Clever Bitch

Don't Get Mad, Get GLAAD

We Are Sooooo Not Buying It

Nicole Still Givin' Away the Milk for Free

Goonies Never Say Die ... They Just Disappear

Marlee Matlin: She's Deaf, We're Dumb

Moss and Daughter Fall Down the Rabbit Hole

Great Scott -- Doc Won't Talk!

Leno: Didn't Mean to Make Them Flaming Mad

John McCain, Old as "The Hills"

Beyonce, Now Mrs. Z?

Jamie Lynn -- Hello Ruby Tuesday

Brit: Carpet Matches Drapes & She's Wearing Both

Keanu Reeves: Good Genes or Good Docs?!

Racist Shields Greasy Self Behind Uncle Tom

Brandon's Flunky Used to be Funky

MacLaine and Greasy Joined at Artificial Hip

"Idol" Wannabes Gag Us with Inspiration

Siegfried to Roy: Nice Piece of Ash

50 Cent to Ex: G-G-G-Get Yo S**t and Get Out!

Baby Mama Wants More Blood from Jordan

You're Froggin' Kidding?!!

'Real Housewives' Real Pain In Ass

Breast Men

Brit -- No More Wiggin' Out

Moses To Heston: Hey Lil' Buddy!

Miley Who? Gimme Dr. Quinn!!

X17's Apology -- Greatest Understatement Ever

"The Body" Replaced by Homeless Drifter

Ike's Ex: What's Death Got to Do With It?

Sweatin' Like a Whore In Church

Barack and McCain's Brackets Suck Too

Verne's Healthy Return to the Land of Giants

Dude! You Don't F**k With George's Lady!

Your Kid Will Never Be As Cute as Kingston

Godfather of Sold!

Blige Blabs Jay and B's Nup News

Farrah's UCLA Snooper Peeped Mrs. Ahnuld, Too

Patricia Heaton Rips Autograph Seeker a New One

Barker's Tatted Bod: Blink 180-Eww

Michael Vick Scores In Prison!

The Bodyguard Will Always Love Your Boobs

Kourtney and Khloe Kondemn Greasy

BA to Naomi -- Take a Boat, B**ch!

Jamie Lynn's Man Is Loaded

BeJay Honeymoons in Exotic Greensboro, N.C.

Cash Pissed Over Pap Invasion

Peyton Tipsy? Read the QB's Eyes

Jennifer Love: Broken and Braless

Major Leaguer Pleads Guilty to Major Drinking

Pam's Ex - So That's Why She Dumped You!

Where Have You Gone, MacGyver!?

Drew Barrymore Stumbles, Mumbles

It's Gettin' Confusing in Herre

D.L. Hughley Sounds Off on Greasy Bear

Seacrest Out ... With Girl!

Owen and Woody -- Asstastic!

"Grey's" Doc's Diagnosis: Sleepwalking?

Quentin Tarantino and RZA: New BFFs?!

Shauna Sand: Thanks for the Mammaries!

Keibler's Former Beau Busted for DUI

Brandon -- Mama Made Me Say it!

"Idol's" Ramiele is Half a Photog Tall

"Project Runway" Auf to Lifetime

What Becomes a Legend Most -- Keeping His Cool

Rob Lowe -- The Bitch Set Me Up!

Jamie Lynn: 17 Going on 80

Busted! Celebs With Crack in Public

Shatner's Common Sense Beamed to Oblivion

Jay-Z's in NY -- But Where's His Ring?!

Kate Gets Wet and Wild

Jasmine's Different World -- The Single Life!

F***ing Around With Rob Lowe Will Get You Sued

Barton Bargains Her Way Out of DUI Rap

Paris - How Much for That Cheetah?

Simon Hung on Photog's Tongue

Greasy Bear -- Black Driver, Yellow Belly

Can't Have Sex in Rob's Bed and Get Away With It!

Conan's Priest Stalker -- Holy Wackjob!

"DWTS" Pros Play "Pimp My Band"

More Shadys Want a Piece of Eminem

Priscilla Moves Judges, Doesn't Move Face

Bodyguard to Lindsay: I Will Always Sue You

Leoni's Forehead: Smooth As a Granny's Bottom

Lily Allen Goes Pissy Blond

Spice Baby Makes Pap Her Bitch

Simon Likes Johns; Neighbors, Not So Much

Dolph Lundgren: Spare Some ... Movie Roles?

Toni Braxton -- Un-break My Heart Attack?

Lowe to Sheriffs -- Stay Away, Outsiders

Loni Love

Dumbass Doherty Sent to Jail Again

Rob Lowe's Chef Knows Nothing 'bout Porking

Chikezie Wants a Load of Locke

Estefan: Coming Out of the Dark Ages

Seacrest Out ... With Girl!

Chef Suit -- A Lowe Down Dirty Shame!

Janice Dickinson -- Seven Years Bad Luck

Suspicious Minds Over Presley's Due Date

Loni Anderson: 'Memba Her?!

Rob Lowe -- I Did Not Have Sex With That Woman

Mama Kardashian a Racist?

Hillary: C'mon Get Happy!

LUI -- Lookin' Under the Influence

Angelina Jolie: Senator Baby Mama?

Lorenzo to Shauna -- Miami, My Ass

Venezuela to Simpsons: Get Out, Gringos!

"Hills" Invaded by More Fame Whoring Nobodies

Ring the Alarm -- Beyonce Pregnant??

Jamie Lynn: Baby with a Bump

Brandon & Rick: Two Vile & Crazy Guys!

Faux "Entourage" Creator Preys on Chicks

Major Flip Out in Santa Monica

"Dancing" Stars: Please Don't Stop the Music

"Idols" Will Inspire ... Mass Nausea!

Wouldn't You Like to Beat a Pepper, Too?

Brad's Rent Offer is the Pitts?

Prince Von A-hole, Royally Pissed Off

Brandon Davis, Pignapped?!

Rihanna and Chris Brown Go Tit for Tats

50 Cent Sued -- Go Shorty, It's Your Payday!

Lowe To Cops: I Can Handle Sex Case On My Own

Archuleta Saw "Angels" Way Before Idol

That's One Agitated A-hole!

Lindz to Paps -- Blow It Out Your Ass!

Noriega Gets a Key -- To Nowhere

Jeremy Piven -- Chokin' On His Chicken?

UPDATE: Judge Disses Prince -- We've Had Bigger

Seacrest Out, Queen to the Rescue

Please Don't Touch the Britney

Crazaziest Celebrity Lawsuit Ever

Tori Spelling Tans Her Fetus

Gummi Bounced from Court

Barron Bites the Big One -- Pleads No Contest

Bikinitastic Beauty Queens!

Dylan McKay is the Spit

Robin and Sean Penn Call Off Calling It Off

Shannon Elizabeth is Watching

A Kiss From a Rose

Ovitz vs. Pellicano -- The Hatables

"Dick Van Dyke" Star Rose Marie: 'Memba Her?

Grandson of a Gun (Kinda)

M-Rod's Bud Keeps It on the Downlow

Dethroned Mess Nevada Cops a Plea

A-Hole: That Pap's a Lying Bastard!

Holy Moley!

Shhhh! Don't Wake the Baby!

Deion $anders Gets Action Off Field

"90210" Actor Found Dead

Jackie Chan - Flight Attendants Goo Goo

Zac Efron Likes 'Em a Little Older

Prince Von A-Hole Faces Der Kommissar

Bike Company Puts Brakes on Greg LeMond

Thomas Jane to Judge: Don't Punish Me!

Ashlee and Pete -- Yep, They Did It

"Hannah Montana" to Axe Scalpers in Minnesota?

Jackie Chan Rolls With Some Tough Bitches

Cheech & Chong's Friendship: Up in Smoke?

The A-Hole Gets Probed

Oprah to Obama -- You're Bringin' Me Down!

Joanie Loves ... Orgasms?!

Hollywood Meatheads!

Courtney Loves' Pills

Government Gives Swayze All Clear to Land

Larry Craig Interns -- You're My Duty

K-Fed's Kids: Can't We All Just Get Along?

Crazazy TV Contraption Predicts "Idol" Losers

Crazy TV Contraption Predicts "Idol" Losers

Victims Too Busy To Testify in Pellicano Trial

A-Hole Just Begging for It

Mischa Done With That Whole DUI Thing

Tim Conway: Third Time's a Charm?

Ed Asner to Ex: Get a Job or I'll Cut You -- Off!

Meg Ryan '80s Glam Is Poison

Cam: Thanks for the Flowers, I'm Not Your Bud

Erin Go Braless

Tabitha from "Bewitched": 'Memba Her?!

Gwyneth Paltrow: Jacko 2.0?

OMFG?! Is This Desperate or What?

Gary Busey: Mental Handicap

Meebo Functionality Test Post - Do Not Delete

C-3PO's BFF Riding the Death Star?

Redirect

Redirect

Chris Brown -- Inappropriately Sexy?

Cristal to Diddy: I Will Cut You!

School Death Plot Targets ... Chuck Norris?!?

Artie Lange to Howard: I Know How to Quit You

Von A-Hole's Fornication Examination

Miss Cali: Keep the Crown, I Want Cash!

Artie Lange to Howard: I Know How to Quit You?

Vanilla Ice Busted After Meltdown With Wife

Doogie to Brit -- You Stunt My Growth!

Pink Lady Trapped in Red China

Gerard Butler -- Cam's Just Another Bitch to Me

Amy's Got a Bone to Pick

Paula Confused by Wild Sea Monkey

Premature Aging!

Gayle: Oprah's No $ugar Mama!

T.O. Has Some Serious Baggage ...

Vanilla -- No Mrs. Ice for You!

Russell Really Knows How to Ride It

Joe Goes Where No Jacko Has Gone Before

Lost in Translation

Rob Lowe Ex-Nanny Wants to Clean Up

Serena's Grand Slam Ass

Soprano Smells a Rat

Eminem Leaves Mandela Hangin' Over Bday Gig

Gloria, The Dr. Ruth of Lawyers, in Rob Lowe Case

Prince: Zsa Zsa Knows I Screw Around

Couric Will Leave CBS On Her Terms

Angel Eyes

Lawsuit Over Heath Ledger and Alleged Coke

Who Cares About Pete & Ashlee?

The Last of "Charlie's Angels": 'Memba Her?!

Coroner: Pneumonia Killed Christian Brando

Lawsuit Claims Ledger Done in By Coke Predators

Celebuspawn Pleads Not Guilty to DUI, Drugs

Rob Lowe's Fired Chef Has "Issues"

Foxy Out of the Henhouse Next Week!

Turks and Caicos Premier Won't Take the Rap

Nina Garcia Auffed from ELLE!

Brooke White's Sister: My Bridesmaid is Cardboard

Newton-John's Daughter, The Genetic Marvel!

George's Girl Not Cuckoo for Clooney?

Cookie Diet Leaves Madonna Feeling Like a Virgin

"Earl" Star on Paris Hilton: She Ain't Stupid!

Adam Sandler Goes Limp

Rihanna Snubs Her Public

A Headlock May Win the White House!

Fake 'N Bake

Donald and Rosie: Shut Up and Do It Already!

Docs Get Off Easy in Brit Snooping Scandal

Von A-Hole -- Money and Bulls**t Fall from the Sky!

Your Boob Just Hit Me in the Elbow

You Can't Keep Dick Down!

Lorenzo to Shauna -- Stop Bitchin' About S. Beach

Britney's New Hairdresser: Doc Brown?

Matchbox 20 Won't Play Because of Some Bulls***

BeJay: Lords of the Missing Rings

Dr. Phil Butts In ... Again

Dr. Phil Pulls the Plug on Teen Violence Show

TMZ to Dr. Phil: Show Me The Money!

Vegas to Mills: Take Your Leg and Shove It

McMeanie Beats Photog in a Stupid-Off

Check Out Those Lip Whiskers!

Shauna Blows Off Ex -- Who's the Renegade Now?

Tom Arnold D*cked Around by Sock Man

Cops to Brit: You Crashed, But Are You Smashed?

Michael Johns: The Stiff From Down Under

CHP Says Britney's Nobody Special

P!nk -- Blinded by the White

The Ghost of "Idol" Future

Britney Had Cosmetic Damage Before Crash

Joey Fatone Had a Better Weekend Than You

Dr. Phil -- Screwed from the Bottom

Heath's No Joke as Face of Batman Flick

Why Can't Jeremy Piven Drive Home?

Girl's Granny Takes Her a Phil Pill

Don't Feed The Kingston

Eco-Warrier Axed By Bored Camera Guy

Sienna's Breast Stroke

Mel B. -- Black Eyed Pee?

Allred Reps All Red Beating Victim

VY to TMZ -- I Ain't in No Draft!

Britney: Chinese Fire Drill Cover-up?

Brody to Youngins: Call Me in Five Years!

JK -- This Suit's Got Me All Blocked Up!

"CSI" Causes Cancer??

Sly Does Jury Duty -- Acts Rambo-esque

Love Drew Long Time

The Hoff Lives

Britney, Is That You?!?

There's Something About ... Marilyn?!

A-List A Cups

It's Official -- Ashlee Is Dumber Than Jessica

Kim K: I'm A Rich Bitch, You're Just a Valet

Kate to Photogs: Gullible is Not in the Dictionary

Dr. Phil's Peeps to Bondsman: We Work for Him!

Shanna Moakler: I'm No Deadbeat Mom!

Heidi & Spencer: All That ... for Them?!

Rambo May Judge Terminator

Colleen Shannon: Valedictorian of the Bimbos

Miranda, That's Not Steve!

Lauren Hutton Gets Shady with Oprah

Greasy: Sorry Excuse

Braxton's Show May Not Breathe Again

Nothing's Gonna Stop Him Now

That Guy in "Perfect Strangers": 'Memba Him?!

Simpsons Tight-Lipped Over Fall Out Baby

Wilson Cruz: My So-Called Near-Death

Daryl Hannah Meets a Pap to Forget

X-Tina: Baby Poppin' to Club Hoppin'

Joe Francis: Trial Gone Hollywood

Topanga To Ponder Probation

Melo Busted for DUI

Cops: Sambora Ain't No Child Endangerer

Shauna Sand: For Sale to the Highest Bidder

Mills Tried to Get Leg Over with Trump?

Nanny -- Rob Touched Me in Lowe Places

Ashlee Rattled by Baby Rumors

Elway Scrambles to Sell Toyotas!

Cops Called For Technical in Melo Assist?

Crowe to Photog -- Stop Being an Ass!

Tom Brady: Balls in a Box?

That a Baby Bump or You Just Happy to See Me?!

Dr. Phil's PA -- What the Puck?

Two-Faced Paris Slams Kim K's Phat Ass

Snoop Trades Crip Blue for Red ... Necks!

McCain Intern -- Chef Boyarthief

Bobby Brown's Son -- You Don't Know Whit

"Hills" Jerk Gets His 16th Minute of Fame

Mr. Burns Sucks in Real Life Too

Tonya Harding Karaokes: Whhhyyyyyyy??!?

It's a Fat World After All

Nanny Says Rob Lowe Exposed Himself

Flea to TMZ: Butt Out!

Lowe's Accuser Just Couldn't Get Enough Rob

Metcalfe Loves Him Some Tig 'Ol Bitties

Kim K to TMZ: Kiss My Big Fat Ass!

Leach's Champagne Wishes & Pole Dance Dreams

Mormon Hunks -- Heavenly Bodies

Nanny Says Rob Lowe Held His Own

This Charming Man

Morrissey from The Smiths: 'Memba Him?!

Sarah Silverman's No Pussy!

Faith Hill: You're the One That I Want

Alba to Pap -- Suck on This!

Lowe's Employees Say They've Never Met Lil' Rob

Debbie Gibson to Crazy Fan -- Shake Your Love!!

'Little Miss Sunshine' Turns the Big 1-2

"Glitter 2" -- "Idols" Sing Mariah

Turks' Top Guy -- Tip of the Palm Tree?

Gibson's Crazy Fan Not Only in Her Dreams

Cameron Diaz's Father Dies From Pneumonia

Does Ash Know Something Pete Doesn't?

Trying to Look Anywhere But There

Posh Leaves Paps All Choked Up

You Can't Keep a Goodman Down

The Artist Formally Known as Invisible EXPOSED!

Cops Foil Josh Holloway's Pap Block

Wesley Snipes -- 1040, Over & Out!

Beckham Likes It Tight and Right

Masters Champ Attacked By Tiger ... Questions

Evan Rachel Wood: Dita 2.0

Kenny G Is One Bad Mamma Jamma

Who Is That? Jenna Jameson? Kelly Ripa?

Kim K's Panty Raid

PETA to Morrissey: To Sirloin, With Love

Wayne Brady -- Bye Bye Boo!

Lee Genes

Golfing Whale Fights Hippo in Court

Britney Is Nuts ... About the Gym

Javier's In No Country for Butch Men

Michele Lee from "Knots Landing": 'Memba Her?!

Morrissey's Got Beef with PETA

Sen Dog Still Livin' the Highlife

Dude, Where's My Mutha F**kin' Car?

Gisele to Bridget: First Your Man, Now Your Baby!

"Big Love" Keeps it Real?

If They Could Turn Back Time

Sorry Ron, They Don't Give Oscars to Paparazzi

Rob Lowe's Accuser -- People Pleaser

Heidi Makes Mess In NYC -- Gets Off on Self

Brit to Lutfi: Have a Bitchin' Summer, Dude

Lowe's Accuser is a Flirting Machine!

Brando No Bran-dough

Miley's Autobiography? It's Called a Diary

To Catch an Old Fart

Nanny's Folks -- Lowe Worked Her to the Bone

Is Dr. Jan Tucking Himself Into More Trouble?

Hayden Christensen -- Jumper, Our Ass

Saget Makes John Mayer His Bitch

Martha's Dead Dog: It's a Good Thing?

Hermione Ditches Hogwarts for Millionaire School

Ving Says His Caretaker Didn't Go To the Dogs

Hey Mr. DJ

Paging Vidal Sassoon!

Shauna Sand -- Oh the Humidity!

Mary-Kate: World's Youngest "Golden Girl"

Congressman to Ric Flair: 'Woooo!'

Johnny Fever from "WKRP": 'Memba Him?!

Sharon Osbourne Will Smack a Bitch Up

Good Luck Chuck -- With Your Baby Bump!

"Full House" -- Still Everywhere You Look

Brit May Club for a Living

Britney May Club for a Living

Woo Hoo! Simpsons Victory in Venezuela!

Screw Matchbox Twenty -- Sue the Activists!

Spencer's Head Emerges from Heidi's Ass

Kelly Ripa to Priscilla - Oh No You Di'nt!

Al Pacino: Charred Face

Hoff to Pam: I Have Your Bach

Ashlee: Fake Singer, Fake Pic, Fake Ring?!

Police Sting?

Hey Jude, Don't Be Afraid ... of Daddy's Ghost

Who Shocked J.R.?!

Bo Don't Know Pap Speak

Bitchfight Brewing for Foxy's Release

Nate Berkus: O is for Overshadowed

Beckinsale: That's a Buncha Pish Posh

apl.de.ap is Huge ... in Southeast Asia

Brit Takes It In the End

Nic Cage's Son Will Haunt Your Nightmares

Cain & Abel - The Gummi/Greasy Edition

Dita Von Teese's Swan Song

Do You Know Who This Person Is?

Heidi and Spencer -- More Whoring To Come

Von A-Hole Picks the Gayest Fight Ever

Lohan's Face Matches the Carpet

Finger It Like Baby Beckham

LAPD Lets Levine Skate

Dita -- Where'd You Get Those F**k Me Pumps?

Godzilla to Subway: I Got Your 12" Right Here

Jenna Jameson: Shuck It, Slurp It

Fantasia: The Apple of Our Eye

Locklear to Pap: Turn Your Head and Cough

Kissing Disease Licks Dennis Hopper's Kid

Look Out ... Foxy's Bustin' Loose!

Ray J Wants Whitney's Crack

Booriah Carey

Nicollette Sheridan Is So Much Hotter Than You!

Dude Looks Like a Lady ... Wait, That is a Lady!

Jordana Brewster: Is Incest Best?

David Spade Made Us Post This

How Many Chins Do You See?

Matt & Ben Go Wild ... No, Not That Matt & Ben

BeJay Fight -- We Smell Bulls**t!

Ding-a-Ling Says Bai to Makeup, Hello to a Job!

Busey Gets A-Buse-ive with TMZ Photog

Katie Couric Gets Moonves'd

To Wong Foo

Catwoman Julie Newmar: 'Memba Her?!

Brody Already on the Rebound

Derek Hough's "DWTS" Fall -- The 911 Tape

CNN's Quest (Allegedly) Gets the Meth Out

"Monk" Star's 911 Call

Judge Rips Von A-Hole an A-Hole

Kanye's Mom Didn't Have Son's Jack

For a Good Time ... Call Disney Star?

Verdine White is One Pretty, Pretty Man

Match Game PM: Post Mortem

Harry Potter Gives Theatergoers the Shaft

Rock's Suit Dropped -- No Kidding!

Brit's Hair: The Roots of All Evil

Jessica & BF -- In Search of a Million Bucks

Obama, Down with Jay-Z?

Under-Aged Sex Pistols, Rotten to the Core

Shamrock Says UFC Lepre-Conned Him!

"Idol" Reject Claims, The Show's Unfair!

Winehouse Takes the Red-Eye to Crazytown

50 Cent -- Alicia, You Ignorant Slut!

Britney's Acting Again -- Hide the TV!

To Wong Foo Thanks for TMI, Julie Newmar

Lynne Spears Likes It Wet

Dude Looks Like a Lady

Sandra Bullock Whacked in Mass

Suri's Two -- Thanks Xenu!

Ashlee and Pete: They're No BeJay

Eddie Van Halen: Might as Well ... Plump?!

Ashley Dupre -- Girl Going ... Nowhere?

James Bond's Whip -- License to Spill

Foxy to NYC -- What Can You Do for Brown?

KRS Keeps the Boogie Down after Smackdown

Paris -- It's Time to Go Clubbing ... Somewhere

Casey Cuts His Short and Pricklies

Who Took a Dump in Her Afikomen?

The Heaving Hills of Vegas

Sand Sinking Beneath Turks & Caicos' PM

Naomi Tries to Good Cop the Coppers

Viva Las Vegas!

One Bags Wifey, The Other Bags Wipey

Krispy Can't Kreme Itself

Izzard to Cross-Dress Over into Politics?

Beth and Dog Out With Their Pups

Wills Lands Big Propeller in Tight Spot

Fresh Errand Boy of Bel Air

Jamie Lynn Baby Bumpin'

Kate Back to Jumping Owen's Bones

And the Sag Award Goes To ...

Miley Makes Sexy Time for Camera -- Again!

It's Fergalicious!

Humping with the Star

Katie Price: A Pox on All of You Chickens

Exes Have Cameron's Back

Ultimate Douchebag Will Wrestle Again

Desperate is Spelled S-P-E-I-D-I

Shauna Sand: Bumper, We Hardly Knew Her!

Jennifer to Brad: Chew on This!

"Cradle" Judges Rock-Blocked, Paula To Blame

Casinos to "NYPD Blue" Star: You Crap, You Pay

Party Like a Posh Star

To the Moon, Bai Ling

Court to Dummies: You Text, You Pay!

The Beckham Doesn't Fall Far From the Tree

Jordin Sparks Not Going Away for Good ... Yet

Victoria's Secret? Ditch Seal for a Good Time!

The Hoff Back to the Hosp

What Is Dave Navarro Kissing?!

McCain Hires Beauty Queen to Wrangle Interns

Hot as the Dickinson

McCain, Obama Tag Team Hillary

"Police Woman" Angie Dickinson: 'Memba Her?!

Von A-Hole Press Conference - You Gotta See This

Ex-Manager to Chappelle: Pay Up, Bitch!

No More "Mother"-in' for Brit ... Yet

Britney Works Belly, Then Works Fans

Paris Hilton: Queen of the Gang Bang

Naomi Bombarded By TMZ Q & A's

Eli & Wife's Hot Honeymoon -- As in Temperature

Katie Price Likes Her Grrrrr-Animals

Follically Challenged Celebs

Lindsay Drinks 'Cause Her Parents Stink

Gummi Bear: The Next Valerie Bertinelli?

Portman to Pup: Pee for Vendetta

Olympian Alleged Victim of Date Rape Drug

"Idol" to Archuleta -- No Prom for You!

Richie Sambora Charged

An Even Kiel

Jaws from the James Bond Flicks: 'Memba Him?!

BeJay -- Signed, Sealed, Delivered!

Olympic Medalist Victim of Date Rape Drug?

Audrina and LC -- Ship Happens

Stifler's Stiffy for the Male Anatomy

Foxy Brown Gets On Her Knees

"Idol" Wannabeen Not the Most Famous Noriega

Steroid Snitch Not Lookin' Over His Shoulder

Obama Girl Stuffs Box for Barack

Country Singer Accused of Assaulting Non-Fan

Forget Cigars, U.S. Should Ban Movies from Cuba

Gisele: Supermodel, Superbitch?

Sambora Cops DUI Plea

Amy's Mouth -- As Bad as Her Skin

"A.I." Song List -- It'll Be a Gay Ol' Night

Jackie Chan: Wax On, Wax Off!

Bitter "Idol" Reject Claims She's Not Bitter

Rapper to Alicia Keys: My Boo? F**k You!

Olympians to Penta Water: H2-0h No You Di'n't

Lorenzo's Inflatable Exes

Miley "Memoirs" Really Worth Millions?

Little (Brooke) White Lies

Steve-O Blows Stunt, Not Coke

Star Jones Files for Divorce

Barack to Isaiah: Thanks, But No Thanks!

Jamie Lynn's Baby Daddy Guns It... Again

Roy to Obama: Heaven's Great, Here's Fifty Bucks

Britney's Psychic Friend Connection

Benny the Bull Whistled for Flagrant Foul

Night of the Living Winehouse

Teen Popped for Pimpin' Out Gangsta Granny

William Hung to "Bang" on Blackboard

Steve-O in Court -- As Defendant, Not Jester

O.J. Wants to Take a Stab at Reality TV

Hollywood's Jailbait

Carly Smithson Hams it Up

Shakira: Finally, Something Hot for House Interns

Jada Pinkett Smith's Noriega Weave

Peter Falk Runs Amok -- Refuses Help and Comb

Mother on the Offensive over Dead Soldier T's

Must See TV

Jay-Z: 99 Problems But a Pap Ain't One

RuPaul: 'Memba Her, er, Him?!

Al Gets Ready to Rumble

Steve-O: I Don't Want to be a Jackass No More

Amber Tamblyn: Joan of the Pill

New Gladiator Hard to Beat -- Just Ask Her Hubby

Celebs Sign Up as Snipers

Foxy Backdoors Lawyer, Lawyer Backs Out

The Skeletons in Camilla's Closet

Commoner Goes Walking with the Stars

Jason Castro: All But a "Memory"?

Poehler Committs NYC's Cardinal Sin

WWE Writer Allegedly Dishes Racist Smackdown

Billy Blanks' Wife Kickboxes Him to the Curb

Rapper to Cops: I'm Bulletproof, Sucka!

"Soul Train" Conductor Kicked in Caboose

Ice Dancer 911 Call -- "She Ingested Something"

What Was Navarro Kissing? Truth Revealed!

Wesley -- The Judge (Mathis) Is in Court! -- redirect

T.O. P.O'd Over Porno

Jeff Archuleta -- Stage Dad? Who, Me?

Mike Tyson's Paunch-Out!

NBC to O.J. -- Like You, We're a Buzzkill

James Bond: License to Crash ... Again!

Winehouse Suspected of Giving Headbutt

Brit: Hit the Gym ... Baby One More Time

Trashy Hollywood

Dwyane Wade and Star Jones Makin' Miami Heat?

Shauna Sand: Hotter than Molten Silicone

Wino Caught with More Crack!

Court: Let Snoop Dogg Back in Da House

Denise Richards' Reality Shows

Shauna Sand Getting Divorced -- Who Knew?!

Dude Looks Like a ... Hot Tranny Mess

George Lopez's Got Enchi-lotta Nerve!

Shia Smoked World's Most Expensive Cig

What's Wrong With Her Face?

Peter Strauss Bitten, Dog Bites Dust

The Hoff Out of the Hosp

Kanye Gets High ... On a Budget

Little Miss Sunshine Crashes Casino Floor

Eat Your Jockstrap Out, David Beckham

Mandy Moore Is 24 Years OLD

Tony Robbins Unleashes the Power of Lawsuit

Brooke Gets Dinged Up Real Bad

McDreamy!

Bobby Ewing on "Dallas": 'Memba Him?!

Mariah Goes from S**t List to Blacklist

Wesley Gets Three Years!!!

Frenchie Claims Shauna Sand Abused Him

MTV Staffer: "The Hills" Didn't Pay My Bills

Co-Star to Douglas: Romance My Wallet

Dr. Phil's Moment of Truth

Absolute Hunk Gives Pap a Licking

LiLo -- AliLo's Show Could Be "Toxic"

"Lost" Diary -- The Shape of Things to Come

Paris Involved in Another Hit and Run

"Scud Stud" Declares "War" on Tom Hanks

Amanda Bynes ... Going Up?

Ex-Steeler Sues For Being Called "Line-Blacker"

Pete Doherty's Bloody Work of Art

Mimi: That's the Sound of Someone Getting Fired

Ryan Seacrest -- From Backstreet to Wall Street

Winehouse: Does She Make You Horny?

Stephen Baldwin: GodSpeedo

Pap to Benji Madden -- Get the Eff Off My Foot!

Jamie Lynn: Burger Bun in the Oven

Seacrest -- From Backstreet to Wall Street

Amy Winehouse Arrested!!!

Winehouse Will Rot In Jail Today

Angelina Jolie Eating for More Than Just Two

Heather to Denise: I Can Stomach You Now

Mr. Toad's Wild Meth Ride

Gisele Spreads 'Em on the Street

America's Next Top Psycho

Song Sings: See My Face in Court!

Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore

Derek Hough: Dancing with the Damned

Alice Cooper: 'Memba Him?!

"Idol" Sticks It to Fan

Snipes Can't Drop Soap for a Loooong Time

Evacuation at "Tonight Show"

Chris Brown Wants a Piece of Kim K's Booty

Gary Coleman and Wife Don't See Eye-to-Eye

Bulletin!!! Cheryl Burke Is no Thespo

Pregnant Hollywood

Will Smith's New Movie Unloads 7lbs of B.S.

Amy Free to Headbutt Again

How Much of a Sex Machine Was James Brown?

Blake Decision Cut in Half, But What's it Matter?

Zoolander: Blue Steel Never Dies

Richie Sambora: Condo Maniac

D.C. to L.A. -- Brother, Can You Spare a Babe?

Photog Drops Genocide Bomb on Kim K

Denise Richards' Fake Reality Peep Show

Phoebe's Cat is No Longer Smelly

Half-Naked Underage Girls A-Ok with A-Hole

Madge's Gardener Bends Over Backwards

Last Night's Bon Jovi Concert Was the Bomb!

Dave Navarro Attracts All Kinds

No Foot, No Problem for Chesney

Playmate Bimbo Supports Herself and "Umbama"

Now Batting Cleanup ... Tony Snow?

Fit After Fame

If You Don't Want to S**t, Get Off the Pot!

Tom Cruise Out With His Other Kids

Good Riddance to Pox Rubbish

Miley -- Hate When My Top Goes Missing!

Yes, This Woman Just Had a Baby

Bush Not the Only Moron in DC

Everhart Busted for DUI

Tarantino in Foot Fetish Heaven

"Baywatch" Star: Worst Supporting Actor

Clooneys Never Say Dye

Whitney Houston's Voice Cracked Out Too?

Jamie Lynn's Man in Prison Stripes

Angie Everhart Busted for DUI

More Drama, Action on "Seven Pounds" Set

Pete Wentz Talks Bush ... But Not GW

Fat After Fame

Custody Report Says Brit has "Issues"

Another Hollywood Meltdown

Miley -- Miles from Reality on VF Shoot

Shia LaPooped

Country Songsmith Fagan Popped for Murder

Isaiah Rider Is a Wanted Man

Look Who's Walking

Farrah to Paps: Don't Make Me Ugly!

Can You Guess the Celebucankles?!

J. Lo & Marc: We're No Heidi & Spencer!

J.J. Abrams' "Alias"

Nashville Stabbing Victim is Cheri Oteri's Dad

Britney Acting Up Again

Breslin Buttered Up by Older Man

Dupre Goes Wild on Joe Francis

Heidi to Posh: My Crap Is Better Than Yours

Scott Weiland Is Going to Jail

Woman to Winkler: Make My Happy Day!

J.R. Ewing from "Dallas": 'Memba Him?!

Who Shot J.R.?

Muscly "Dancing" Star Screws Up Muscle

Miley Muzzled by Mouse for Months?

Lil Mama in Not-So-Lil Rumble

Soccer Star Plays Ball -- With Three Transvestites

"Dancing" Stars: Better Him Than Me!

Vanilla's Battery Case -- Iced, Iced Baby!

Jimi Hendrix Sex Tape!!! Gives Good Headband

Johnny Depp Stimulates ... Local Economy

When Celebs Breed

TMZ Bible Thumped by Rev. Wright

Cristian Will Likely Say Hasta Luego

Lance Bass Is Huge Down Under

Heidi Montag Is a Fashion Designer

Rob Reiner: Montag Isn't On My Radar

Dina Lohan: First Class Bitch!

Pauly Gets Teste with Pap

Jim Belushi ODs ... on Multitasking

"CSI" Star Popped for Heroin, Coke, Ecstasy

Barack: Rev. Wright Ain't My Mouthpiece!

Disney Bites the Photog that Feeds It

Hulk Puts the Moves On ... His Daughter?!

Feds Nab UCLA Worker for Selling Celeb Files

Markie Mark

"Night Court" Star Markie Post: 'Memba Her?!

No Sign of Cristian Yet

Ricky Not as Thicky

Duff Clueless About Meth Faced Co-Star

"Idol" Is a Diamond in the Rough

Will Cristian Be the Only One to Go?

Cristian de la Fuente MIA

De la Fuente Will be Shot in Bed!

Ryan Ain't No Dunkelman!

X Marks the Spot!

Smart Cookies

Cristian in the House

"DWTS" -- Deaf and Numb

LiLo Cuts One with Snoop

Baby Mama: Dash Owes Me Cash!

Earth to Paula -- Come in, Paula!!!

Nanny Claims Rob Lowe's Wife Sexual Harasser -- redirect

Ling Ling Dead Dead

Hollywood Hot Spot -- Smokin' Hot!

One of These Things Is Exactly Like the Other

Paula Boozy Before Snoozy "Idol"? -- redirect

Bob 'N Weave

Billy Bob's Son Alleged Sex Crime Victim

Paula Talks, Words Come Out

Former "Idol" Has Bone to Pick ... from Hot Wings

Pierce Brosnan: Not Shaken or Stirred

Disney's Dirty Little (Victoria's) Secret

Nina Garcia to Make Birth Control Fierce

No Queer Eye for This Gay Guy

Fergie's Daughter Is a Big Girl Now

"Idol" Castoff -- Even More Delusional Than Paula

Finally Someone Hotter Than Heather Locklear