Whitney Houston & Ray J

For the first time since Whitney Houston's death, her ex-BF Ray J has returned to the hotel where she died back in February ... TMZ has learned.

Ray J -- who was one of the first people to arrive at the Beverly Hilton Hotel on that fateful day -- had avoided returning to the hotel for months because it was "too hard" for him to return to the scene.

But today, Ray J had to overcome his fears to do a scheduled media event at the hotel for his new TV project, "The Rickey Smiley Show" ... an event he couldn't afford to miss.

Sources close to Ray tell us ... the singer was overcome with emotion when he arrived to the hotel ... telling friends "it hurt inside" to have to relive his most painful memory. He also said it was "very weird" walking the halls again.

Still, Ray J is telling friends ... Whitney wanted him to do well and would be proud of him.

How convenient ... just hours before TMZ posted a story about a stylist suing Ray J over designer clothes that went missing from Whitney Houston's death room in February, the singer found them.

We posted it a few hours ago -- Ray J's being sued by an L.A. stylist named Marc Littlejohn, who claims he gave Ray J $2,880 in designer threads for a Grammy event ... and they were never returned. According to the lawsuit, they were left in the Beverly Hilton hotel room where Whitney died and haven't been seen since.

But now Ray J's rep tells TMZ the mystery was solved last night when one of Whitney's associates handed the clothes over to the singer. Sources tell us the items were taken from Whitney's room along with the rest of her belongings. We're told Whit's people couldn't get in touch with Ray J because he changed his phone number.

The pricey fabrics include two suits and one jacket.

When Whitney Houston died, a little bit of Ray J went with her -- well, Ray J's clothing anyway ... and now he's being sued for the expensive items that mysteriously disappeared from room 434 at the Beverly Hilton.

In recently filed legal docs, L.A. Stylist Marc Littlejohn claims he was hired to do Ray J's wardrobe styling on February 10 for a Grammy related event ... problem is, he alleges all the duds he let the singer borrow were left in Whitney Houston's room.

Houston died the next day in that room and, according to the lawsuit ... the pricey clothes haven't been seen since.

Now Littlejohn is suing Ray J for $2,880 -- the cost of the missing clothes -- insisting he's reached out to both the singer and his mother/manager repeatedly to get some cash or the threads.

Ray J was almost physically removed from the Billboard Music Awards last night after angry members of Whitney Houston's family ordered their security to get him away from them ... TMZ has learned.

Pat Houston's blood was boiling because she, Bobbi Kristina and other family members were seated next to Ray J, the person Pat believes was a very bad influence on Whitney. Minutes before the tribute to Whitney, Pat asked her security to remove Ray J from his seat, but he refused to budge.

Our sources say ... Pat's security summoned hotel security, along with several uniformed officers to physically remove Ray J.

Just before push was about to come to shove, security warned Pat that things would likely get physical and it would almost certainly be caught on video, just as Whitney was about to be honored. Sources say Pat then grudgingly recanted and Ray J kept his seat.

For his part, Ray J groused to friends, "Pat ruined what was a great opportunity to honor the woman who I loved."

11:40 AM PDT -- A rep for the Houston family tells TMZ ... Pat's assistant DID ask for Ray J to be moved from his seat ... but only after an official from Billboard told the family they needed to move to the seat that Ray J was already using.

Since Ray J had a ticket with the proper seat number, he refused to budge ... so Pat's assistant called for security to help sort out the situation.

Ray J is pissed that people are accusing him of being Whitney's enabler and, even worse, fueling her with the fatal dose of cocaine.

Ray J's rep tells TMZ ... the singer had NO KNOWLEDGE that Whitney was using again.

The rep says Ray J is especially upset at claims made by Bobby Brown's sister, Leolah Brown, who went on TV Thursday night and suggested Ray J was to blame for Whitney's demise. Ray J says the claim is absolute B.S.

Ray J is adamant ... he is NOT secretly harboring a stash of sexually explicit photos and video, depicting him and Whitney Houston in the throes of passion -- because no such stash exists.

There have been reports ... Ray is sitting on a hoard of sex tapes and XXX photos -- holding them over the Houston family as ransom -- because he knows they're worth a pretty penny.

But Ray J's rep tells TMZ, "The despicable tabloid report released today claiming the existence of a sex tape between Ray J and Whitney Houston is not true ... There is no sex tape."

With his famous older sister Brandy by his side, a somber Ray J walked through LAX moments ago to board a plane bound for Whitney Houston's "Home Going" ceremony in New Jersey.

The siblings strolled quietly through the airport along with their mother. At one point, Brandy put her arm around Ray J as photogs fired off question after question about his relationship with Houston.

Ray J has broken his silence on Whitney Houston's death, saying, "Over the past few days, I've tried to process the emptiness that I am experiencing. What my heart feels cannot be expressed in words. The world lost an icon, but I lost my close friend."

Ray J continues, "Nippy, I miss you so much!" Nippy was a nickname Whitney's dad gave her.

And Ray J adds, "You were so happy and full of love. Your smile will live in my heart forever."

Ray J was dating Whitney in the months before she died.

Ray J was home when he got the word Whitney Houston had died last night, but he was turned away by law enforcement at the hotel after he raced over to try and see her ... TMZ has learned.

Sources close to Ray J tell TMZ he went straight to the Beverly Hilton to try and see Houston as soon as he got the call that she had passed away. He had not been with Houston at all that day or the night before.

We're told when he arrived, law enforcement turned him away just as they did Bobbi Kristina. Ray J can be seen in the photo above, moments after, outside Whitney's room on the 4th floor.

Whitney Houston and Ray J sure seemed very couple-y outside a restaurant in West Hollywood last night -- because when it came time leave, Ray J was the PERFECT gentleman.

As the two were leaving Le Petit Four on Sunset Blvd last night, Ray J opened the door for Whitney, made sure she was safely snuggled inside, and then shut the door for her. Chivarly ain't dead!