The Hills

Unlike Victoria Beckham's dVb collection -- which is now on the sale rack at Loehmann's -- Montag's clothing line Heidiwood has completely sold out at Robertson Blvd. boutique Kitson. "The Hills" are alive with the sound of cash registers.

But if you want to get your hands on one of her hoochie shorts or cheapie dresses you'll have to look elsewhere -- sources tell us Kitson won't be getting a new shipment of Heidi's line until the summer or fall collection comes out. Make it stop!

Moral of this story: It's a lot easier to sell crappy $44.95 jeans, than crappy $250 ones!

UPDATE: The dVb line is holding its own! Posh's line has completely sold out at the Reseda Loehmann's - beautiful Reseda, California - where the "Karate Kid" lived!

Oh yeah, and they thought their presence helped make it an "A-list" event.

The lawsuit, which was filed today in Los Angeles Superior Court, claims the assistants typically put in more than eight hours a day, without meal breaks, yet were not paid overtime. Welcome to Hollywood!

For the days they worked on location, the assistants claim MTV provided them with already-completed and filled-out timesheets -- which reflected an eight-hour day -- even though on numerous occasions they worked much longer. Looks like the "real world" isn't just hot tubs and drunken hookups!

Royal Caribbean has released renderings of its new cruise ship, Genesis, using photos of real people scattered throughout the ship. So look real close, and you'll see none other than "The Hills" dimwits. But here's the deal....the ship has violated the law.

Spencer Pratt caused seizures on Robertson this weekend -- blasting Heidi Montag's "music" from his car as he waited to pick up his fame-hungry girlfriend from Kitson. We asked Spencer if he actually enjoyed the song ... but if he said anything, it couldn't be heard over the shrieking.

We also spotted them having a casual (by which we mean awkwardly businesslike) rendezvous with "Access Hollywood's" Maria Menounos later in the evening. Because they're all such close pals.

And after making that brilliant insight outside the Kobe Club, she also said she's starring with Denzel Washington in a movie. We're guessing, it's the same way Natalie Cole starred in a movie with her dad -- aka, green screen.

The Johnny Depp wannabe (sans charisma, manners and a brain) has landed a gig posing for Orthodox, a sporty men's wear label. Think it's ambitious for Mr. Bobby to land a job on his own? Fear not, Orthodox is a division of People's Revolution - the place Whitney, and now LC, "work."

Isn't it great how everything just seems to work out on "The Hills"?

How else can you describe a pap welcoming committee of Britney proportions for two people who do absolutely nothing?

Instead of 20-something hotties throwing themselves at him in Malibu yesterday, Jenner was accosted by a gaggle of 13-year-olds. No word on which of them he'll go with to the Sadie Hawkins dance.

Thanks to a few well-placed peeps desperately seeking their 15 minutes and a boring conversation with LC, Brody and Frankie turns into something actually worth watching!

Joe Scarborough asked McCain what he thought of the fact that Heidi Montag, lame-ass "Hills" star, endorsed him. McCain ever-so-not cleverly evaded the question, saying Heidi was a "very talented actress." Joe had just launched into one of the hard-hitting attacks he's famous for, accusing him of not being a fan of "The Hills."

Clearly embarrassed -- though it completely escaped Joe -- McCain then volunteered he had also received endorsements from Clint Eastwood, Sly Stallone and Jon Voight. Clearly those are meaningful endorsements, because everyone wants Rambotox's choice as the next leader of the free world.

McCain didn't have much to say -- but his bodyguards did, rushing the photog off-camera and threateningly asking why he'd ever ask a question like that . It's like someone asked him about bathrooms and airports! Why is Heidi such a scandal? Is it too hot for McCain to address? We're just sayin'.....

McCain told Time that he is "honored to have Heidi [Montag]'s support," and that he never misses an episode of "The Hills," especially "since the new season started."

Ok, now that is the guy we don't want answering the phone at 3:00 AM.

Resident "Hills" dolt Heidi Montag tells Us she is entering the political arena, even though she doesn't really know what an arena is ... and she's endorsing John McCain.

Somewhere, Obama and Hil are grinning.

"The Hills" vixen is learning to strip the layers of Hollywood one article of clothing at a time. This move guarantees at least five more minutes in the spotlight. But just five ...