Prez Election 2008

Joe the Plumber's next stop: The Ivy restaurant.

The heretofore unknown and more or less mediocre Samuel J. Wurzelbacher is trying to elasticize his 15 minutes of fame: He's actually enlisted three managers to craft his "brand," and could get into country singing. "Joe is a hard-core country music fan, and he can carry a tune," says his manager apparently without irony.

If this YouTube clip is any indication, Cheech was right.

TMZ spies spotted the now 35-year-old with a male pal leaving a screening of Guy Ritchie's "RocknRolla." Upon realizing she was being photographed, Lewinsky barked, "A**hole."

Svedka hosted the brilliant "Hollywood DC: Lights! Camera! Election!" art show at the World of Wonder gallery in Hollywood, one that skewers celebs and politicians in a whole new medium. All the pieces are available for purchase and we're told Heidi Montag even bought a $800 painting ... of herself.

With the news that Ashley Todd lied about that whole "I was mugged and beaten because I support McCain" story, our good friends at Gawker reminded us of the tale of Justin Zatkoff. Back in 2006, Zatkoff invented a story that he was beaten up because of his political views after a Michigan College Republicans meeting.

Turns out Zatkoff made the whole thing up and was just beaten up by his friends. Ooops!

Flashforward to last month -- Zatkoff, now chair of the Michigan Federation of College Republicans, was fired from his position within the Republican National Committee's "Victory '08" Campaign. According to the Michigan Review, Zatkoff was fired after he stole 300,000 pieces of campaign literature from Michigan campaign headquarters.

According to WJLA, when the 911 operator questioned Joe's misuse of the emergency only service, the 66-year-old barked "F*** you" and hung up. The annoyed operator called back the number that placed the call and got Joe's voice mail, which included an endorsement to elect his brother.

No word on what caused the highway congestion.

UPDATE: Brother Joe called into a local radio station, WTOP, to apologize for the whole thing. Click to listen.

Ashley Todd told police she doesn't know how she got the "B" on her face and suspects she might have done it to herself in her car, but doesn't actually remember.

Police say she was very polite and very cooperative, however they have discovered she has a history of mental problems.

Cops say she is being charged with making a false report to police.

The high-end NYC department store's windows currently feature paintings of all the First Ladies of yore and include portraits of both Michelle Obama and Mrs. McCain. While all the works by artist Laurie Munn were made to the women's general likeness, Cindy's looks uniquely ghoulish.

So the question -- by putting the pics up, has Barneys not-so-subtly endorsed Barack Obama? We contacted the store -- a little defensive.

Besides playing Mrs. O, we're told Maya -- who left the show last November -- will once again co-star with Amy Poehler in their "Bronx Beat" skit. Oh my gawd!

Tragically, we're told Tina will not be back playing Sarah Palin on Saturday.

New info from the Pittsburgh Police Department -- there is a gaping hole in the story of the woman who claims she was attacked because she's a McCain supporter.

The PD has released a statement saying "We have received photos from the ATM machine at the Citizens Bank and the photographs was (sic) verified as NOT being the victim making the transaction."

In other words, the woman who says she was attacked at the ATM machine wasn't there at the time of the alleged attack.

The cops offered new details about her allegations. In addition to the attacker allegedly knocking her to the ground and carving a "B" in her face, she says the attacker "reached under her shirt and fondled her breast."

The woman who claims a big, bad Barack supporter allegedly used her face as a human Etch A Sketch has taken a lie detector test ... and Pittsburgh cops are still skeptical about her story.

The woman claims she was at an ATM earlier in the week when a big dude noticed she had a McCain/Palin bumper sticker on her car. She says he attacked her and carved the letter "B" in her cheek.

As we first reported, cops had serious questions about her story. Now we've learned they conducted a polygraph. The results have not been disclosed, but a PD official says her department is "still dealing with inconsistencies with her statements."

Here's what we're wondering -- why did she decline to go the the hospital when it happened, saying she'd get around to it another day?

Mini Obama from Jeff Beacher's Madhouse was there too -- and got motorboated. God Bless America!

We told you yesterday Pittsburgh PD has some serious questions about the alleged attack and mutilation of Ashley Todd, the McCain campaign volunteer who says a black man carved a B into her cheek in a politically-motivated assault.

Today, there's more things that cops are wondering about: a police source tells the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette Ashley didn't make any reference to the whole McCain-Palin bumper-sticker thing during her initial report, and she didn't go to the hospital until almost four hours after the allegedly brutal attack.

Pittsburgh law enforcement sources tell TMZ they have serious questions about the authenticity of the alleged victim who says she had her face cut by a politically-motivated attacker.

We're told there are several things about the alleged attack that don't add up. A Pittsburgh PD official says they are conducting a "thorough investigation" and have not determined if the alleged attack is real or a hoax. But we're told there is definitely a level of skepticism.

As we reported, the alleged victim claims she went to an ATM and when she turned around, a large dark-skinned man took the money she withdrew. She says when he noticed she had a McCain/Palin bumper sticker on her car, he became enraged, knocked her down and cut a "B" in her face.

We're told the woman refused medical assistance at the scene and said she would go to the hospital the next day.

Here's what went down with the McCain/Palin supporter who was allegedly attacked in Pennsylvania last night.

According to Pittsburgh cops, around 9:30 PM last night, Ashley Todd was robbed after she went to the ATM. The victim says during the robbery, the assailant saw the McCain/Palin sticker on her car and became "enraged." He struck her and knocked her down, and allegedly carved a "B" on her cheek.

The assailant is still at large. Police tell us all they have is a description -- a man, 6'4", with dark skin and dark clothes.

A McCain spokesman confirmed to TMZ Todd volunteered in McCain's Pennsylvania office.

Club Paradise in Vegas is calling all Palin imitators to shimmy and shake down the runway in their hottest eyewear tonight. Best part: First prize is $10K and a trip to exotic Washington, DC.

No plans as of yet have emerged for a similar John McCain-inspired show ... for the ladies.