Conor McGregor Screw Floyd, I'll Box Anyone ... Now Let's Talk Chicken!

conor_kal
LOVE CHICKEN, HATE FLOYD
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Hard to tell what Conor McGregor's more fired up about right now -- getting his hands on Floyd Mayweather ... or on a juicy fried chicken breast.

Justin Bieber Goes Full Kanye On the Paparazzi

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SILENCE!
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Justin Bieber's got more than a little Kanye West in him, and it was blatantly obvious when he hit a West Hollywood club.

Bieber pulled up outside Delilah Saturday night, and immediately reminded the paparazzi about his new rule -- no yelling at him. He's put photogs on notice before -- but this time it sounded almost word for word like a NYC run-in with Kanye a few years back.

A blond dye job doesn't seem far fetch for Justin either. Just sayin' ...

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NO TALKING!
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Shia LaBeouf Soulja Boy's a Sweetheart ... Not Worried About Threats

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HE DOESN'T NEED MY HELP
AKM-GSI

Shia LaBeouf knows Soulja Boy doesn't mean it when he says don't come to Atlanta, 'cause Soulja's a sweet kid at heart -- or at least that's what he's assuming.

Paps got the actor-turned-MC out Thursday in Studio City, where they asked what he had to say to Soulja ... who issued an ultimatum in rap's biggest -- meaning, silliest -- beef since Drake vs. Meek Mill.

Let's just say Soulja's probably on his own for landing a major movie debut.

Charlie Sheen Brooke & Kids Are Good It Could've Been Much Worse

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THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT
fameFlynet/AKM-GSI

Charlie Sheen says his ex-wife and twin boys are safe and sound, and he sounds grateful things didn't spiral out of control more.

Paps ran into Charlie in Bev Hills and got an update on his 7-year-old sons ... who were with Brooke Mueller as she wandered around Salt Lake City bars and hotels late Tuesday night into Wednesday morning. She allegedly slapped them.

Luckily, he says all is well now -- even though he hasn't spoken with Brooke personally. As we reported, she's undergoing psychiatric evaluation.

Val Kilmer Swollen Tongue, Slurred Speech ... I Have to Cancel My Tour

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IT'S NOT CANCER BUT ....
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Val Kilmer is struggling to speak with a severely swollen tongue -- and while he still denies he has cancer -- whatever his ailment is ... it's forcing him to put his work on hold.

Kilmer shocked an audience in L.A. Thursday night that showed up for a screening of "Citizen Twain." The actor was drooling as he explained his tongue had recently swollen up and he was still recovering.

He did not say what caused the swelling, but a couple weeks ago his former co-star Michael Douglas claimed Val was battling oral cancer. He denied the cancer, but did say he had a lump on his throat.

Kilmer was in good spirits though, and even joked with the crowd about having to dab saliva from his mouth. He says the mystery condition is forcing him to pull the plug on his one-man play version of 'Twain.'

Al Pacino Catches Heat From GF After Dodging Scent of a Marriage

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...AWKWARD
Farandula Show / SplashNewsOnline.com

Just when Al Pacino thought he was out of marriage talks, paps in Argentina pulled him right back in ... with his girlfriend standing right next to him!

The Godfather, and his Argentinian gf, Lucila Sola, had no trouble answering questions in Buenos Aires -- until one photog went and asked if he was ever going to marry her?

You gotta see Al's reaction -- half Sonny Wortzik frantic stammering, half Michael Corleone defusing a GF ... who's clearly very interested in his answer.

Monica Lewinsky Not Part of the Donald Trump Convo

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DECISIONS, DECISIONS
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Donald Trump dragged her into the current presidential campaign, but Monica Lewinsky is NOT happy about being back in the political spotlight.

Monica was at LAX Friday morning, and with Trump fighting off sexual misconduct allegations -- and also raising old Bill Clinton allegations -- she's suddenly relevant again.

The photog asked the ex-White House intern if she thinks Trump is "fit to be President?"

Watch how she reacts, and think about this: Who WOULD you vote for, if you were Monica Lewinsky??

Anyway, she had more important concerns this morning. Monica tweeted she was upset about not having makeup on when the pap spotted her.

Joanna Krupa Lost In Translation: Beach Bum Edition

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BUMMIN' IT
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Joanna Krupa brought another meaning to the term beach bum down in Miami.

One minute the Polish model was like a fish in the surf ... extremely slippery when wet.

Then she was on land, where her husband, Romain Zago, unfortunately got in the picture and made sure she was protected ... from the sun.

Check out the vid -- pretty sure he didn't miss a single spot.

Joanna gave us even more proof ... her body's just fine. Totally fine.

Waiting for your permission to load the Instagram Media.

Kanye West Racing to Kim's Side

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HEAVY PROTECTION
AKM-GSI

Kanye West beat a hasty retreat out of his NYC pad to rendezvous with Kim Kardashian.

A somber and determined Kanye walked briskly out of the apartment building Monday morning to a waiting vehicle ... on his way to a local airport to pick up Kim ... who fled Paris after the armed robbery.

Note the numerous bodyguards flanking him during the short walk. You can bet he and Kim will be surrounded by a small army from now on.

Michelle Rodriguez Lighten Up, People ... I'm Bisexual, Never Transphobic!!

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CHILL OUT
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Michelle Rodriguez doesn't think anyone will be offended by her new movie ... because her own sexuality proves she'd never hurt transgender people or anyone in the LGBT community.

We got the "Fast & Furious" star at LAX talking about her role in the action film "(Re) Assignment" -- in which she plays a male assassin who undergoes a sex change against his will by a deranged surgeon.

It's clear she's peeved about the controversy ... and has some simple advice for any haters.

Take a look at what Michelle had to go through to play the role of Tomboy.

Ryan Lochte Protesters We Did It For America ... But 'DWTS' Guards Did Some Damage

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LEAVING JAIL
AKM-GSI

The protesters who rushed Ryan Lochte on "Dancing with the Stars" wanted to get revenge for the swimmer embarrassing Americans at the Olympics ... and they say they'd do it again.

59-year-old Sam Sotoodeh and 25-year-old Barzeen Soroudi -- who are related -- explained their antics when they got out of jail Tuesday ... still sporting their "No Lochte" shirts. Barzeen says he was in Rio for the games, and Lochtegate made him a target while he was down there.

Even though he put himself in the line of fire with the protest ... Sotoodeh has a major issue with the way security guards took him down on the dance floor. Watch, everything about his reaction reeks of lawsuit.

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WHAT A RUSH
ABC

Iggy Azalea French is a Friend ... But He's Got a Shot!

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THERE'S A CHANCE ...
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Iggy Azalea is calling French Montana a "friend" ... but the numbers just don't add up.

The rapper was leaving LAX Sunday when the photog asked her status. His follow-up question was way more revealing ... on a scale of 1 to 10 what are the chances her relationship with French will blossom into romance?

One thing's for sure ... Frenchie was all about it in Cabo.

Boy George Alexis Arquette Did Me A Solid ... In 'The Wedding Singer'

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PROPS TO ALEXIS
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Boy George was not bent out of shape over Alexis Arquette’s impersonation of him in “The Wedding Singer” ... he actually really dug it.

George stopped the Culture Club concert in Maryland Sunday night and dedicated “Do You Really Want To Hurt Me” to the late actress and activist.

It’s a sweet tribute … Alexis passed away earlier in the day of an unknown illness. She was 47.

Ryan Lochte I Won't Go to Brazil to Face Charges ... Not Happening

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HANDS OFF MY HARDWARE
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Ryan Lochte says he'd love to go back to Rio one day ... but it sure as hell won't be to face charges in the whole gas station incident ... so says Lochte himself.

Lochte was charged with filing a false police report in Rio and officials have summoned the swimmer to Brazil for a hearing ... but Monday morning at LAX, Lochte said prosecutors shouldn't hold their breath.

There's more ... Lochte says he's heard rumblings that the U.S. Olympic Committee will either ban him from swimming or strip him of his '16 Olympic medals over the incident ... but says, "I don't think it's gonna happen."

As for Jimmy Fallon spoofing him at the VMAs Sunday night, Lochte says he didn't see it -- but ain't mad either ... insisting he thinks the mockery is actually funny.

Shemar Moore My Message Wasn't for Gibson ... But Other 'Criminal' Star a Possibility

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TWISTED MESSAGE
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Most people thought Shemar Moore's cryptic words on karma were all about his ex co-star -- and nemesis -- Thomas Gibson, but Shemar's hinting it WAS aimed at a different "Criminal Minds" actor.

Shemar was out in L.A. when a photog asked if he was reacting to Thomas getting fired from "Criminal Minds" ... since they famously had beef on set. Check out the clip ... Shemar says people got it twisted -- denying he was throwing shade at Gibson.

The other prime suspect is Keith Tisdell -- a former friend and co-star who was recently convicted for stealing $60k from Shemar's charity. He definitely did NOT deny it was Tisdell.

As for his current feelings about Gibson? Shemar was polite, for sure, but still seems kinda icy.

Karma, bro.

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WHAT GOES AROUND ...
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Chad Johnson I Didn't S*** My Pants

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HERE'S THE REAL POOP ...
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Ex-'Bachelorette' villain and now ex-"Bachelor in Paradise" contestant Chad Johnson says he was done dirty by producers who made it look like he did dirty in his pants.

Chad says he never crapped his pants and that's just one example of creative license gone amok.

As for whether he'll do another show ...