Paparazzi Photo

Jessica Alba still does spring break like she's 23, and she's got the booty to back it up -- as she proved on a Caribbean beach with Chrissy Teigen.

Jessica, Chrissy and John Legend were frolicking in the water Thursday -- and it's almost like Alba's ass knew it had to do something to stand out with so many celebs in one spot.

Mission accomplished.

Not to be a buzz kill, but Jessica's 3-year-old daughter Haven is in the photo too (pink hat).

Sorry. You may now resume objectifying her mom -- and because we have a deep respect for history ... here's a classic.

Not that Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart have been fooling anyone -- but they're officially banging again ... and we're basing that on the fact they're finally swapping spit in public again.

Smart swung by "American Idol" Wednesday night to scoop up JLo and they kissed out in the open for everyone to see. They've been sprinkling clues for months -- slipping out of a GQ event together, partying at Big Sean's House of Blues gig ... and his dogs were at her house (which didn't end well).

They broke up last April after 2 1/2 years, but what if it was all for show?

J.Lo's insisted they're just friends, but after so much smoke ... this has to be a 3-alarmer.

Amber Rose has an ass that just won't quit ... getting Photoshopped -- and here's a little before and ass-ter to prove it.

Amber posted a bunch of Instagram shots from her day at the beach in Hawaii -- and everything was so smooth. But then we got some paparazzi shots of her ass -- it's hard to miss -- and these pics are straight outta dimpleville.

Truth is Amber's in good company -- even Beyonce's been busted multiple times altering pics.

And say what you want about it, but that booty trapped Kanye West AND Wiz Khalifa.

Respect.

And from the no-filters-required department ... we offer these. On fleek.

Zayn Malik's face ... hours after he quit One Direction ... said exactly what millions of 1Ders were thinking -- "OMG, what the hell have I done?"

Zayn was out in North London on Wednesday afternoon ... settling into retirement, at 22 years old.

While he reportedly cited "stress" as the reason he originally dropped out of the band's tour -- word is he was worried his lifestyle on the road was messing up his life with his fiancée.

The band plans to continue without him and finish its tour before the next album comes out.

Meanwhile, Zayn will be wondering if he's the next Timberlake ... or the next Kirkpatrick.

The Game puts work before pleasure ... 'cause even though the rapper is hanging with one of Justin Bieber's former hookups -- it ain't funny business, just money biz.

Sources close to model Chantel Jeffries say The Game definitely wants her ass ... as the star of his upcoming music video shoot. We're told that's what they were discussing while they grabbed a bite at The Ivy Tuesday afternoon.

Besides, they're both kinda spoken for -- Game with his ex-fiancée, Tiffney Cambridge ... and Jeffries with The Weeknd.

Still, we know Game's hip to the paparazzi game -- so he damn well knew lunch at The Ivy would start a buzz ... about him and Chantel, and his video.

It's called showbiz for a reason.

Rock legend Jimmy Page has a whole lotta love ... for a girl 46 years younger than him!

The iconic 71-year-old Led Zeppelin guitar god was spotted walking hand in hand in London with Scarlett Sabet, a 25-year-old actress.

Creepy fact: Page has a 44-year-old daughter. She's a photographer ... named Scarlet.

Lil Wayne did it big in Hollywood ... as in big PDA with Christina Milian -- the first public confirmation of the rumors they're banging.

Weezy and Christina were leaving a movie set on Tuesday and he had a firm grip on her hand ... something we've never seen them do out in the open. In fact, other than an appearance at an award show, the couple's been kinda like a unicorn.

Christina -- who's signed to Young Money -- has been mum about dating the boss, but this is clearly their coming out.

As for why Wayne was holding her hand so tightly -- just a guess, but Drake was spotted in town.

Amal Clooney is on the diva fast track -- based on her latest outfit ... she's going full-court press on the Hollywood glitz thing.

George Clooney's bride is a quick study in attention-grabbing ... Amal stepped out for dinner in NYC in a midriff-baring ensemble that would have Lady Gaga licking her chops.

Amal reportedly lunched with Anna Wintour earlier in the day ... so it's possible she's gearing up for a Vogue spread.

Scott Disick took a break from partying, rehab hijinks, and then partying some more to spend time with two of his kids, Mason and Penelope.

Disick and the kids hit up a sushi joint Tuesday in Calabasas.

Disick bailed on his trippy Costa Rican rehab this week and came back to L.A., but not before some serious Costa Rican clubbing. He's already booked a club appearance in Vegas for this weekend at 1 OAK in The Mirage Hotel & Casino.

"Millionaire Matchmaker" star Candace Smith made the perfect love connection on an L.A. beach Tuesday ... between her ass and the paparazzi.

Candace -- a former beauty queen -- hit the sand for some volleyball and a pigskin toss (looks like she has game) ... with her pal ex-Miss USA Susie Castillo.

Like all finely tuned athletes ... Candace knows nothing's more important than stretching. Well, that and a very small bikini.

Watch your back around "The Flash" star Grant Gustin ... from the looks of things, he's the class fast clown on set.

Gustin broke his boredom during a shoot in Vancouver by busting out the ole bunny ears ... at a security guard's expense. Sure, he could have been flashing (yeah, we know) the peace sign -- but the smirk on his face is a dead giveaway.

Tom Brady likes his buns toasted ... Gisele Bundchen's that is.

Tom dropped back to his Costa Rican beachfront estate with Gisele and the fam for his annual off-season vacay.

Sure, Tom has a shiny new trophy that says otherwise -- but, from this angle, it's clear the real MVP in this family wears a bikini. A very small green bikini.

Yeah, we know what you're thinking ... #FML.

Oh boy ... David Letterman snuck out of his island retirement home without his shoes again ... at least it looks that way.

Dave was down in St. Barts this past weekend mentally preparing to step down from the 'Late Show' when he took an early morning Caribbean jog ... sans shoes, only socks.

There's a ton of studies about the benefits of jogging barefoot ... and Dave's embracing all of them during his island time.

Justin Bieber has a new dog ... which has got to be worrisome for the pooch.

Bieber took the puppy for a fancy dinner at Mastro's Sunday night in Bev Hills. It's unclear why the restaurant let the terrier in.

Bieber Instagrammed the photo Sunday night ... showing the snuggly lil pup wrapped in Bieber's tatted arm. Her name is Esther ... reason unknown.

This is where history is both useful and alarming. You'll recall Biebs famously gave away his pet hamster to a fan a few years back (it died a few months later) and abandoned a pet monkey at a German animal shelter.

Good luck, Esther.

Patrick Schwarzenegger looked the worse for wear in Malibu Saturday.

Arnold's son returned from Spring Break in Cabo, where he got chummy with a couple of chicks, apparently much to the dismay of Miley Cyrus.

One girl was his best friend's girlfriend, and the other was his ex, but it was all out in the open and certainly looked innocent enough ... to some, but not MIley.

Patrick and a few buds hit up a Malibu restaurant, where he hooded up, looking pretty pensive.

Patrick is a student at USC. Miley didn't go to college. Is this just part of a ritual that Miley doesn't understand, or does she have a point?

We're kinda tired of solving this mystery, so we'll leave it to you. Is Kim Kardashian that fickle that she'd change her hair color twice in the same month, or is wearing a wig?

This pic was taken Friday in Calabasas. It paints a dark picture of Kim K ... this, just weeks after she became blonde during Paris Fashion Week.

Check out this pic Kim posted with her photographer, Ellen von Unwerth. BTW, Ellen specializes in "erotic femininity."

Now that we think about it, screw the hair. What's Kim up to now?