Hot Bodies

Best autocorrect ever?

Dictionary.com defines "lardass" as ... "a person having unusually large buttocks."

Just sayin' ...

Candice Swanepoel in St. Barts. Day 2. Victoria's Secret photo shoot.

This could not possibly have come from apes.

Can we get an Amen?

That shirtless jogger who went viral because he's hot and looking for love, has something more than just great looks to offer -- he's a 24-year-old virgin.

Ethan Renoe tells TMZ he's been single since 2008, but all that's likely to change since he's been hit up by a couple thousand women after WGN posted the clip of Ethan for a run Sunday in Chicago in the rain ... without a shirt. As he explained, it was just too wet for a top.

Now the recent grad of Moody Bible Institute is getting flooded with offers. Ethan says he's serious about finding himself a woman, but says he's still going to wait for his honeymoon to tear up his v-card.

As for the rest of his dating profile -- Ethan's into photography, personal training, nannying, construction, teaching and, of course ... running topless in the rain.

Candice Swanepoel's ass refuses to be contained -- and we're all better off for it.

Swanepoel hit the beach in St. Barts for a bikini photo shoot over the weekend, and her swimwear got overshadowed by a simple pair of jeans. Yeah, we know it's most likely just for the camera, but watching her struggle to slip on the denim is still ... entertaining.

If her longtime boyfriend, male model Hermann Nicoli, hadn't popped the question last week -- he definitely would have after this.

Victoria's Secret model Josephine Skriver got smashed from behind when she underestimated the power of the ocean during a recent photo shoot in St. Barths.

The video is awesome from the very start -- Josephine rolling in the sand, ass in the air -- but gets even better when she decides to wash that sand out of her nether regions.

Watch, you won't be disappointed when the surf takes aim at Josephine. It's alright to laugh ... her tiny frame held up just fine.

Daphne Joy -- best know for this, and being 50 Cent's baby mama -- is a sight to behold from almost every angle you can imagine ... but especially from behind.

Daphne's got a 3-year-old kid with 50 Cent and is rumored to be dating Jason Derulo now. She pretty much gave away the secret to her dating success on the beach in Miami.

Fiddy must love watching her leave.

Jimmy Graham's nightmare season might've just gotten a little better ... 'cause there's a super hot bikini model who says her ultimate career goal ... is to hook up with the Seahawks TE.

The ridiculously hot woman in question is Dalia Elliott ... who is also an actress, having starred in flicks like "The Bunnyman Massacre" and "Attack Of The B.I.M.B.O.S."

Elliott says she's a HUUUGE fan of the tight end -- and if he calls her up, he might end up seeing a little action after all this season.

Peep the gallery below Jimmy ... we could think of worse ways to recover from that season ending injury.

Victoria's Secret Angels have no problem rolling around in mud ... and we have no problem watching them do it.

John Stamos pulled a Kim Kardashian and flashed his bare ass in a photo spread for Paper magazine.

Everywhere you look ... there's his ass.

Selena Gomez didn't make her "Hands to Myself" music video specifically for Justin Bieber's pleasure -- but that doesn't mean he won't be playing this on a loop.

Selena just released a little teaser of the video, with an emphasis on TEASER ... 'cause the chick is strolling around in nothing but lingerie.

The video kinda hints at masturbation -- even if the lyrics don't -- and since Justin's clearly had his ex on his mind a lot lately ... this should keep him busy.

Yolanda Foster showed up to the 'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' premiere party Thursday night in a dress that gave a pretty clear message she's back on the market.

Foster, who's been battling Lyme disease, looked radiant and was all smiles days after announcing her split from her husband of 4 years, music producer David Foster.

She's said she's heartbroken over the split but you couldn't tell from her game face ... and body.

Russell Simmons showed off his incredible flexibility as he struck a few yoga poses Thursday on the beach in Miami.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Scott Eastwood's West Coast take on 'Jersey Shore's gym-tan-laundry involves catching waves, selfies and hitting up a hardware store and yeah ... he's shirtless too.

Eastwood paddled out just north of San Diego, and wouldn't ya know it -- he had to strip down in public to slip in and out of his wetsuit. Check out the pics ... strictly for the surfing, of course, and NOT his ridiculous body.

When it was all said and done, Clint's son hightailed it to Home Depot to do some drilling -- or, sorry ... to buy a drill.

Will and Jada Pinkett Smith's idea of a family vacation doesn't involve the usual rest and relaxation.

The Smiths hit the beach in Hawaii this week with their kids, and instead of lounging around ... they made it an action packed trip -- including gym workouts and surfing. Kind of explains why 17-year-old Jaden's already so ripped.

Scott Eastwood held on for way longer than 8 seconds while riding a mechanical bull at a San Diego bar ... so long it's actually pretty impressive.

Clint's son has had some practice ... he played a pro bull rider in the chick flick, "The Longest Ride." And, of course, his dad played a cowboy in a ton of his flicks, so it's no surprise really Scott's a natural.

If the movie thing doesn't work out ... bull ridin' might be another calling.

Kylie Jenner is taking full advantage of the whole "I'm 18 now" thing by flaunting her whole ass ... professionally, of course.

Kylie did a racy latex-laden spread for Interview Magazine's December-January issue.

Things we've immediately gleaned from the article -- she could be one helluva waitress, or a dominatrix ... and she LOVES ice cream. Okay, we just looked at the pics.

There's a debate in our office over whether she's wearing chaps or leggings, but we ultimately realized ... it doesn't freakin' matter!

It might not break the Internet ... but Kim Kardashian's gotta be proud of her little sis, nonetheless.

They grow up so fast.