Hot Bodies

This year's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover girl Kate Upton and last year's cover girl Irina Shayk proved they looked hot in clothes too at an event in Las Vegas on Wednesday.

Question is ...

The Situation's GTL bestie Jonny "The Unit" Manfre took time out from fighting with Snooki on "Jersey Shore" and flaunted his buff & hairless strength at Muscle Beach in Venice Beach on Wednesday.

The Unit -- alongside his smoking hot XXX girlfriend Amia Miley -- proved his jacked up muscles weren't only for show, and even held himself up sideways off a bar.

Victoria's Secret model Doutzen Kroes in Miami Beach yesterday -- aka why God invented bikinis.

Game over.

Former "Hills" villain and half of one-time reality TV D-list supercouple Speidi ('memba them?), Spencer Pratt proved he's even larger now (left) than in his 2009 heyday (right) as he left a gas station in L.A. on Tuesday.

Look out K-Fed, because this is how Spencer rolls.

"Late Night with David Letterman" registered a GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY on the Richter scale yesterday -- when voluptuous Sports Illustrated cover model Kate Upton and her heaving chest paid the TV host a very welcome visit.

While on the set of his new flick "Welcome to the Jungle" in Puerto Rico on Tuesday, action star of yore Jean-Claude Van Damme proved he's still the Muscles from Brussels by showing off his tan, buff bod ... and his new Tom Selleck approved '70s porn stache.

The secret is out ... and so is the RIDICULOUSLY SMOKIN' HOT photo ... Kate Upton has been awarded the prestigious title of 2012 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition cover girl.

TMZ has learned ... a few of the issues arrived early to a gas station in Michigan ... and the pics are already making the rounds at breakneck speed. Props to @willdefries for the heads up.

S.I. was originally scheduled to announce the cover girl and reveal the cover shot at an event tonight ... but now, the cat is out of the bag.

We called S.I. about the early release ... but reps for the mag had no comment.

UFC hottie Arianny Celeste's bikini executed a breathtaking submission hold earlier today at a pool in Miami -- squeezing her boobs so tight ... the lovely ladies nearly came loose.

Miranda Kerr got into a sticky situation while poolside in Australia the other day, but luckily her sexy friend was around to serve as her personal bikini bottom wedgie assistant.

Sometimes even gorgeous supermodels get their panties in a bunch.

"Bachelor" castoff Blakeley Shea is showing Ben Flajnik what he's really missing out on -- performing a head-spinningly sexy breast-in-the-face lap dance this week ... and there is a God ... because it was all caught on tape!!!

Blakeley hosts a weekly "Bachelor" viewing party at a nightclub in Charlotte, NC -- where she's from -- and on Monday, she got eliminated from the show ... so she marked the occasion by getting down and dirty with one of her girlfriends.

In his never-ending quest to avoid a real job, former "Bachelor" Jake Pavelka has signed a deal to become the next piece of man candy at Chippendales.

Jake will begin his stint at the Rio in Las Vegas on Feb. 23 and will serve as the celebrity MC ... just like former 98 Degrees singer Jeff Timmons and "Jersey Shore" star Ronnie Magro.

Sources tell us Jake's getting the VIP treatment ... with his very own dressing room -- but we're told he WILL NOT be wearing the signature Chippendales cuff and collar.

She's the breakout star of this season's "Mob Wives" and one of Staten Island's finest convicted cocaine dealers, but Angela "Big Ang" Raiola brought out the big, er, guns to the west coast when she went to BOA in L.A. on Monday.

Jennifer Lopez showed off her 42-year-old mother of two taut flat stomach while in Malibu the other day.

The "American Idol" judge was looking belly good, as her 24-year-old boy toy lover Casper Smart frolicked on the sand with her daughter Emme.

But just because the Giants are completely deprived of their bouncy-cheery-spirit-fingers-hotness, doesn't mean you eyeballs have to be punished.

A crowd of Justin Bieber fans was thrilled to see their hero skateboarding outside his recording studio in Miami last night -- then he took off his shirt and they went BALLISTIC.

Bieber was at the Hit Factory and a crowd of about 60 fans gathered outside. According to one witness, the group waited about five hours for a glimpse of the Biebs, when he finally obliged and came out to skateboard for a few minutes.

The most disturbing part ... after he took off his shirt and the screaming subsided, one girl BEGGED for Justin to give her his shirt, promising, "Please, we'll share it!"

"Captain America" star Chris Evans showed off his super buff superhero hairy chest and abs while at some sorta photo shoot at Vasquez Rocks Natural Park outside L.A. on Wednesday.

The 30-year-old knows being shirtless is his patriotic duty.