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It's time to retire slapping the bag with your wine drinking, and NO MORE CVS-store bought wine either!!! Help us help you with something a bit more sophisticated ... and worldly.

We got a sweet deal here that'll bring winery-quality vino right to your front door. It's called the 50% Off World Wine Tour Collection: 18 Bottles of Wine + Free Shipping. Subtle, right?

At nearly $9 a pop, you'll get 18 premium wines from every corner of the world -- places like Argentina, Italy, Spain, Australia and beyond -- and don't worry ... you'll get a solid mix of reds and whites, unless you wanna customize your order. That's an option as well.

Prefer reds? The all-red pack is for you. Like 'em light n' white? There's an all-white pack too! Or, for the folks with an open palate, you can get both. Some wine categories that are available ... Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, Pinot Noir, Malbec, Chardonnay, Pinot Grigio, Sauvignon Blanc, and more. In other words, a little somethin' somethin' for everyone.

This collection includes up to 12 different grape varietals from international vineyards, and the boxes come with information about each wine, including the tasting notes and origins, so you can impress the pants off of your friends at your next dinner party.

Health is wealth in our book, and when you have imported wine packed with grapes, raspberries, and blackberries (or a lime and green apple fruit combo) ... you're sending your body a clear message of love.

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Losing your cool in all this heat??? Before you go breaking into your neighbor's pad to enjoy their frosty A/C, allow us to introduce an answer to your sweaty summertime woes.

We're talking mini personal air conditioning units here, and yes ... they're WAY less high maintenance than that monster of a machine you got hanging out your window right now.

We call it the EvaChill EV-500 Personal Air Conditioner, and we got 'em on the table here for a measly $80 ... which is still cheaper than what you'd pay for something less effective you might find at Target. What do you mean, exactly? Welp, this little puppy can drop the air temperature immediately around you down to 59º in under 10 minutes. Pretty cool, huh?

Just one push of a button and it instantly starts evaporating water -- via a water tank you gotta fill -- in order to cool the air. And, get this ... it's super eco-friendly, and portable too.

The basic models can last up to 9 hours without being plugged into a USB port -- bye-bye electric bills -- and they also shoot away dust particles while chillin' your ass out. And yes, if you were wondering -- we got 'em in a few different colors to go with your own aesthetic.

Now, if you're wondering if there's a slightly more advanced version you could get your hands on -- here's the answer ... YES. It's the EvaSMART 2: Smart Personal Air Conditioner.

This one has stronger specs, and it functions as a purifier/humidifier on top of its A/C function. It costs a tad more -- about $100 or so -- but it beats the hell outta frying for 3 months.

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Sick of having all your personal info being SUPER exposed online all the time? Yeah, us too ... that's why we're gonna help ya out with a little something called P-R-I-V-A-C-Y.

Strap in, because you're about to be schooled in a little 'sumpin 'sumpin called VPN -- AKA, virtual private networks. Sounds fancy, but trust us ... it's simple.

Think of it like a private tunnel that takes your online data (like the sites you visit, your credit card number ... ya know, stuff you DON'T want randos on the Internet to have access to) and routes it to a private virtual island where no one, not even your sneaky Internet service provider, can get access. And, yes, you high-key need one these days.

Fortunately for you, we got a VPN offer up for grabs -- and get this ... you can have it for LIFE!!! It's called KeepSolid VPN Unlimited, one of the most trusted VPNs on the market, and it costs just $40. Yep, that's a helluva lot cheaper than anything else comparable.

With VPN Unlimited, you can browse the Internet safely (keyword: SAFELY). Not just that, but you'll be able to route your traffic to over 400 VPN servers in over 80 locations, including the UK, Canada, and Australia, to name a few. Why does that rock? 'Cause it lets you access streaming servers like Netflix & Hulu as if you were in those countries, meaning you just unlocked worldwide Netflix access, and your binging options are now limitless. Score!