Keegan-Michael Key Award Show Jokes Should Not Go Low

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PUSH THE POSITIVE!
TMZ.com

Keegan-Michael Key joined a very lucky group on the TMZ Celebrity Tour ... offerin' up advice on how award shows can evolve so comedy bits don't drag people down.

Keegan hopped on our bus in Bev Hills ... and as his wife and writing partner Elle kicked it on the sidewalk, he offered up some tips on cringe-worthy humor during these awards shows.

KMK put it plainly -- you can make a killer joke that has a positive message ... but bringing someone down should be out of bounds.

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STEALING THE SPOTLIGHT
NBC

He's pretty clearly referring to last week's Emmys ... where Jimmy Kimmel was dragged for "passing out" on stage as Quinta Brunson accepted her award for Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series.

After finishing his TMZ Tour "Ted Talk," he entertained passengers with a throwback from 'Key & Peele' ... breaking out his substitute teacher character that he debuted a decade ago!!!

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CELEBRATE CINEMA

Baby Keem Don't Lose Your Phone at Mr. Morale Show... I'll Troll You On TikTok!!!

Kendrick Lamar's Mr. Morale and The Big Steppers tour is full of surprises -- just ask TikTok user @cjlove2670 ... who lost her phone during one of the shows, and just realized it now has exclusive Baby Keem content!!!

CJ took to TikTok to reveal Kendrick's Grammy-winning cousin claimed ownership of the device and filmed a couple of hilarious trolling videos before hitting the stage himself.

Waiting for your permission to load TikTok Post.

"N****, why the fuck you throw your phone on the homie's stage?" Keem teased from the side of the stage as the crowd revved up to Kid Cudi's "Pursuit of Happiness."

Following his apparent performance, Keem got comfy backstage and again taunted CJ ... noting the sounds of Chief Keef's "Faneto" being enjoyed by everyone in the crowd except the fan without the phone.

For her part, CJ claims she didn't throw her phone on stage but seemed glad to have it back ... however that happened.

Kenny and Keem's Mr. Morale Tour wraps up its North American leg Saturday in L.A. and after this viral moment, the demand for "I'm two-phone Baby Keem" should be through the roof!!!

Jimmy Kimmel Big Apologies to Quinta It Was a Dumb Bit!!!

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EMMY EXPLANATION
ABC

Jimmy Kimmel knows how to read the room, so he was quick to apologize to Quinta Brunson for his Emmys bit gone flat.

Quinta appeared on Jimmy's show Wednesday night, and he effusively expressed his regrets for overshadowing Quinta, who snagged a trophy for Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series.

As you know, Will Arnett dragged Jimmy out onstage as Kimmel pretended he was passed-out drunk and he lay there as Will read the noms, announced Quinta as the winner and while Quinta gave her acceptance speech.

Jimmy was ready from the jump for a big mea culpa. As soon as Quinta sat down on the couch, Jimmy went right into apology mode ... "it was a dumb comedy bit that we thought would be funny." In other words, he's now in on the non-joke.

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STEALING THE SPOTLIGHT
NBC

Then Jimmy joked..."I lost, and then I drank too much, and I had to be dragged out on the stage. And then people got upset. They said that I stole your moment, and maybe I did. I'm very sorry if I did do that — I'm sorry I did do that, actually."

Quinta was more than gracious, essentially saying it didn't bother her ..."I was honestly in such a moment of having a good time, like I won my first Emmy! I was up there happy, and I was wrapped up in the moment."

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TIME FOR A DO-OVER
ABC

Fact is ... Quinta and Jimmy have history. He was an early supporter of her, bringing her on his show and singing her praises.

Everyone moves on.

King Charles Freaks Out Over Leaky Pen ... This Bloody Thing!!!

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PEN-DEMONIUM

King Charles might be wearing the crown, but he's still dealing with problems that we commoners come across every day ... including pens that bleed like a hemophiliac.

The new British monarch was on hand for a signing ceremony at the royal residence of Hillsborough Castle in Northern Ireland Tuesday ... where he and Queen Consort Camilla were trying sign some sort of book.

KC3 was having trouble right off the bat ... forgetting it was September 13 and not the 12th as he was putting down his John Hancock. Camilla noted he'd screwed up earlier in the day as well. Just as Charles was pulling the pen back, it started leaking ink on his hand.

He was instantly frustrated, saying he hated the pen ... going on to angrily call it "this bloody thing" as he pawned it off to Camilla, who also noted it was going everywhere before Royal aides came to her rescue.

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GREETING THE PEOPLE
BBC World News

The King, meanwhile, stormed out ... still pissed over the writing instrument, grumbling to himself that this happens "every stinking time." It's pretty hilarious, just 'cause Charles is usually buttoned up in public. Seems this desk cam caught him in a moment of candor.

BTW, it seems pens and pen paraphernalia might be Charles' kryptonite -- the guy also had a minor meltdown earlier over the weekend when he came across a pen box on his desk as he was attempting to sign a proclamation making him the new top dog ... kind of a big deal.

As he was taking a seat, he frantically motioned for an aide to get all the pen crap out of his way ... and it was all quickly whisked away so he could get to business.

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INK ISSUES

Time to pick up a 10-pack of BICs, KC ... seems ballpoint might be the way to go.

Jennifer Coolidge to Emmy Orchestra You Play Me, I Play You ... I'm Not Leaving, I'm Dancing!!!

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DANCIN' IT OUT
NBC

Jennifer Coolidge punked the Emmys in spectacular fashion Monday night ... when she defied the orchestra that was trying to get her off the stage and turned the whole thing into a dance party!!!

Jennifer won the richly-deserved award for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Limited Series and at first, seemed a little flummoxed ... she says she swelled up after taking a lavender bath ... so much so she barely got into her Emmy getup and had trouble speaking.

She was hysterical ... seemingly rattled as she ticked off the people she wanted to thank.

Then, the dreaded orchestra started to play her off, but Jen wasn't having it. She made it clear this could be a "once-in-a-lifetime" moment and wasn't about to go quietly.

The band then pivoted to more lively music, and rather than taking the hint, she busted a move that sent the audience into an uproar of laughter. It was Ferris-Bueller-like as other celebs in their seats started to feel the beat in solidarity!

Definitely a high point of the evening.

Jason Sudeikis Thanks Kids at Emmys ... Amid Custody War w/ Olivia

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SHOUTING OUT THE KIDS
NBC

Jason Sudeikis thanked his kids at the Emmys -- reminding folks he's in a nasty custody battle with Olivia Wilde, perhaps unintentionally.

The actor was delivering an acceptance speech Monday after his show, "Ted Lasso," won for Outstanding Comedy Series ... and toward the end, he name-dropped his young son and daughter, Otis and Daisy.

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NOT THE SCRIPT
BACKGRID

It sorta flew under the radar, as not everyone knows his children's names by heart -- but it was there ... and if you've been following along, it may run deeper than a simple shout-out.

As you know, both Jason and Olivia have been at war lately over where their kids should live, and how much time they spend with each parent -- a case that's not yet settled, but which has had a lot of bumps along the way ... including a public serving of documents earlier this year.

A process server, acting on Jason's behalf, dropped legal docs at Olivia's feet while she was presenting for her new movie at CinemaCon -- something she later called "vicious."

JS denied having planned it to happen that way deliberately, but OW thinks otherwise. In the end, Olivia walked away with a win ... getting a judge to side with her that their custody case should be heard in L.A. and not New York, which is where Jason wanted to hash things out.

None of that drama was on display, though, when Jason was speaking ... he was all smiles with his cast onstage, and didn't further allude to the fight with Olivia whatsoever. Although, he might have been wondering if he was about to get served.

BTW ... Jason took his good vibes and carried them on outside the venue. We ran into him on the street after the show, and the dude was totally engaging with fans ... snapping selfies and signing a ton of autographs. He even gave 'em some life advice.

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MAN OF THE PEOPLE
TMZ.com

Seems he's just as beloved by the people as his character is. Olivia, at the moment, is in the middle of all kinds of professional drama with her "Don't Worry Darling" cast.

Drake I'm a Stand-Up Comic Now!!! ... Hosts Nike Maxim Awards

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TAKIN' SHOTS

Parties coast-to-coast Friday night, with Drake hosting the Nike Maxim Awards in Beaverton, Oregon ... AKA Niketown.

Here's what stands out ... Drake did stand-up, and he was pretty funny. Among the yuks ... "Nike is 50. Nike's so old, it's wearing New Balance!" Respectable, for sure.

Drake took aim at Kanye, Tyga, Adidas and Reebok. He tipped his hat to the Nike stable of stars, including LeBron, Serena, Kevin Durant, Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Virgil Abloh and Cristiano Ronaldo.

At the event, stars like Travis Scott, DJ Jazzy Jeff, Ronaldinho, Sheryl Swoopes, Russell Westbrook and Carmelo Anthony were there for all of Drizzy's jokes.

While most folks wear Nike on their feet, Drake decided to go north and wear it on his head!

Ravens' Morgan Moses Custom Chappelle Cleats For Opener ... 'Game, Blouses!!!'

Forget Lamar Jackson, the guy to really watch during the Ravens' season opener this weekend is Morgan Moses -- 'cause he just copped some custom Dave Chappelle shoes for the occasion ... and they're awesome!!

TMZ Sports has learned Baltimore's offensive tackle hit up popular artist Mike Jordan to get some dope imagery put on his spikes for the team's first game of the season against the Jets.

Jordan tells us Moses let him pick out the design ... and since Moses loves pancakes and wanted Ravens colors, he decided Chappelle's famous Prince episode was the perfect theme.

If you haven't seen it -- the 2004 sketch is hilarious ... Chappelle dressed up in a Prince suit and replayed the fictional time the legendary singer beat Charlie Murphy in a pickup basketball game -- and ate pancakes afterward.

On the right side of the cleats, Jordan put Chappelle wearing the same fit he did in the show with a plate of pancakes. On the left side, he put Chappelle in the Prince suit making a funny hand gesture.

The left cleat also features Chappelle's hilarious saying in the show, "Game, Blouses," under the Nike logo.

Jordan -- who has done work for several NFL stars including Tre'Davious White in the past -- says it took 12 hours to put together ... and ensured Moses will get 'em just in time for the Sunday afternoon kickoff!

Harry Styles I Went to Venice to Sit and Spit ... Mocks Chris Pine Viral Video

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HARRY 'SPITTIN' STYLES

Harry Styles is leaning into the whole "I hawked a loogie on Chris Pine" story by leaning in on it ... which is exactly what he did Wednesday night in concert.

Harry performed to a sold-out crowd at Madison Square Garden, where he told his fans he had just popped over to Venice to spit on his fellow costar of "Don't Worry Darling." No doubt he was trying to telegraph the story was BS, and the fans ate it up.

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SNEAKY SPIT

As you know, a video's been circulating that shows Harry taking his seat next to Chris Pine at the Venice Film Festival and as he sits it looks like he spits on Chris's lap, and Chris reacts in a way that aligns with what lots of folks think.

Chris's rep called the story ridiculous, saying it never happened. However, a source very close to Chris tells TMZ the actor had said privately that it did indeed happen.

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WHO KILLED MJ?

There may be more drama among the cast than on the screen. If the spit was real, it actually might be brilliant. More attention to the film ... right?

Jerry Seinfeld I Put Mets Woes On Timmy Trumpet!!! ... 'Stupid' Performance

The hottest sports take of the week goes to ... Jerry Seinfeld???

Yup, the comedian just unleashed the doozy on social media ... saying he believes the Mets' recent woes are all because of Timmy Trumpet.

Seriously.

Seinfeld -- a HUGE Mets fan -- made the claim in the comment section of SNYTV's Instagram post Wednesday ... pinning New York's September slide on Trumpet's Aug. 31 in-game concert.

"I blame that stupid Trumpet performance," Seinfeld said. "Celebrating in season. We haven’t won anything yet. Bad mojo."

Seinfeld then compared it to when his favorite team lost the 2000 World Series to the Yankees ... writing, "Same as when Baja Men showed up to play 'Who Let Dogs Out' in 2000 WS. Series ended right there."

Of course, it's going to be very hard to get Mets fans to agree with him. The team and its supporters have loved Trumpet and his famous "Narco" song, which plays over the stadium speakers when NY's closer, Edwin Diaz, comes out to the field.

In fact, the team's fans cheered LOUDLY when the musician played it in person at the Aug. 31 game.

Seems Seinfeld, though, is convinced it's all leading to the downfall of his beloved squad -- which is now tied for first place in the NL East with the Braves despite having a huge lead earlier this year.

Sorry, Timmy.

Sherri Shepherd I Got Sweet Advice From Oprah Before My Premiere Show!!!

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WORDS FROM THE WISE
TMZ.com

Sherri Shepherd is set to take over Wendy Williams' TV spot in less than a week's time ... and she'll do it armed with some "amazing" advice from Oprah Winfrey.

We got Sherri Tuesday in rainy NYC, and she told us the "Oracle" -- aka Oprah -- gave her some wise words about how to conduct herself as she launches her own self-titled talk show.

O basically said the key is putting out good vibes, and Sherri must be following that advice already ... because folks were chanting her name as she stepped onto the street.

There's no doubt she's taking Oprah's words to heart -- after all, she made a pretty divine comparison. Just check out the video.

As we reported, "Sherri" is movin' into Wendy's old stomping grounds at Chelsea Studios -- promotion was underway last week, with a big poster going up where one for Wendy's show used to be.

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WHO KILLED MJ?

Production sources told us the studio also got a redesign, and they're already booked with celebs well into the Fall.

Vegas Magic Show Patron Masturbates backstage ... Hey, That's Not a Wand!!!

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THIEVES GONE WILD

A man was caught on camera stealing a magician's costume in the dressing room of a comedy club ... and for his next trick, he decided to pleasure himself backstage while no one was around ... this according to cops.

This clip is insane ... a man appears to walk right into the dressing room of the Laugh Factory in Vegas, inside the Tropicana.

One performer loungin' on the couch seems to notice the man walk right toward the wardrobe rack, but didn't seem to think much of it.

According to the police report, obtained by TMZ, the man swiped a pair of pants, a T-shirt, and a hat from the show's headline act, Murray The Magician.

The report says Murray was told the suspect showed up again a few days later with someone else, seemingly scoping out the area.

After leaving, the same person who stole Murray's costume returned alone, sat on the dressing room couch, and appeared to masturbate under his clothes.

Murray stated no one at the comedy club recognized the individual, but to be on the lookout if he returns for an encore.

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WHO KILLED MJ?

BTW ... the alleged masturbator is still on the loose ... so to speak.

Tiffany Haddish Expresses Regret Over Child Molestation Lawsuit

Tiffany Haddish is responding to the lawsuit filed by two people who say when they were sexually abused when they were children in a comedy sketch, saying she regrets doing the sketch but can't say much more.

Tiffany went on IG Monday and said, "I know people have a bunch of questions. I get it. I’m right there with you. Unfortunately, because there is an ongoing legal case, there’s very little that I can say right now."

She went on to express remorse, saying, "But, clearly, while this sketch was intended to be comedic, it wasn't funny at all – and I deeply regret having agreed to act in it. I really look forward to being able to share a lot more about this situation as soon as I can."

The 2 plaintiffs, a male and female, say Tiffany and Aries Spears "groomed" the then 14-year-old girl and her 7-year-old brother, allegedly coercing them to film explicit skits. The boy says he was molested by both defendants.

According to the lawsuit, the girl says Haddish gained her trust and convinced her to film a sexually suggestive video, with Tiffany teaching her how to mimic fellatio for the skit.

Tiffany's attorney, Andrew Brettler, told TMZ the lawsuit was purely an extortion attempt ... "Plaintiff's mother, Trizah Morris, has been trying to assert these bogus claims against Ms. Haddish for several years."

Brettler went on, "Every attorney who has initially taken on her case -- and there were several -- ultimately dropped the matter once it became clear that the claims were meritless and Ms. Haddish would not be shaken down. Now, Ms. Morris has her adult daughter representing herself in this lawsuit. The two of them will together face the consequences of pursuing this frivolous action."

Both siblings say they have developed social disorders ... and the brother claims he is so afraid of being watched or recorded he places band-aids over all the cameras on his electronics.

The siblings also say their mother tried to reach a $15,000 settlement with Spears over the alleged molestation video. They are going after Haddish and Spears for damages.

Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle Trash Talk Will Smith ... At UK Comedy Show

Will Smith may have unloaded with his bare hand, but Chris Rock says he was wearing kid gloves when he told "that joke."

Chris and Dave Chappelle launched their European tour at Liverpool's M&S Bank Arena in the UK Friday, and Rock squarely addressed his joke and the slap that ensued. ... “Did that s**t hurt? Goddam right… the motherf***er hit me over a bulls**t joke, the nicest joke I ever told!"

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TAKIN' NO DISRESPECT
ABC

This is new info ... Chris has never really addressed the G.I. Jane joke himself, but he clearly thinks it was harmless, which may be why he never saw it coming when Will jumped on stage.

Chappelle chimed in about his own brush with stage violence. Referring to the guy who jumped on stage and attacked him at the Hollywood Bowl a few months back, he said, “That was some scary sh*t,” and then joking ... “Was that Will Smith?”

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SNEAK ATTACK
TMZ.com

Chappelle had some biting commentary for Smith, calling the slap "a very strange choice," and then adding that Will “did an impression of a perfect man for 30 years.” Then he went in for the kill ... "I just hope he doesn't put that mask back on."

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WHO KILLED MJ?

Dave and Chris will be in Europe for a few weeks before coming back to the U.S. later this month.

Nicole Brown Simpson Sister Calls Out Chris Rock ... Lame Joke, Do Better

Chris Rock invoking the late Nicole Brown Simpson didn't land with the public, and it's definitely not landing with her family either -- 'cause he's getting dragged by them.

Tanya Brown, Nicole's sister, tells TMZ ... CR's crack wasn't just unfunny, it literally doesn't make sense. She says equating getting slapped at the Oscars to a gruesome double homicide is apples to oranges -- so, she thinks it's lacking in logic and a basic connection.

With that said, Tanya tells us his attempt at humor was distasteful to say the least, and offensive to the extended family ... especially since she believes it was totally gratuitous.

What TS wants Chris -- and anyone else who might want to invoke Nicole's murder in their bit -- to know is this ... there are still surviving family members who are still dealing with her loss to this day, and this type of stuff hits close to home and hurts people.

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TAKIN' NO DISRESPECT
ABC

Tanya says she thinks Chris could've used any other analogy to make his point ... and didn't have to punch down to something that doesn't even relate -- coming off as tacky as a result. She believes comedians should be held accountable for what they say, including Chris.

Well, one could argue that's happening right now ... CR is certainly being called out by a lot of people online, who also thought the joke was cringe-worthy.

Some are so outraged by him name-dropping Nicole and likening her tragic situation to his ... that a select few are even suggesting maybe he deserved getting smacked by Will Smith. Remember, he said him going back to host the Oscars would be like NBS going back to the restaurant she was at before being killed to get her eyeglasses. Indeed ... grimace territory.

Tanya isn't going that far ... but she does agree, this was a complete misfire on his end.

Chris Rock Taking Heat For Nicole Brown Simpson Murder Joke ... Some Say He Deserved Slap!!!

Chris Rock has the Internet up in arms over a joke he made comparing his possible return to The Oscars with Nicole Brown Simpson's vicious murder.

Rock performed Sunday in Phoenix where he reportedly told the audience coming back to host the 2023 Oscars would be like asking Nicole Brown Simpson to go back to the restaurant where she ate before she was brutally murdered in 1994.

Some people on social media have accused Rock of being misogynistic and cracking jokes at the expense of a woman, similar to the criticism he got for the Jada Pinkett joke. Others on social believe Will should have slapped Chris harder.

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TAKIN' NO DISRESPECT
ABC

It was 6 months ago when Will Smith got up on stage and slapped Chris after the comedian made a joke about Jada's shaved head.

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WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?

Chris Rock later said he was unaware Jada suffered from alopecia.

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IF THERE'S A WILL THERE'S A WAY

As a result, Will was banned from the show for 10 years.