Celebrity Boobs

Jessica Simpson has two huge obstacles to overcome on her quest for her old bod ... her giant boobs ... 'cause Jessica says they've gotten so big, she can't go running.

Simpson is finally discussing her tremendous weight gain to People.com, claiming she packed on the pounds during her pregnancy because "It was the first time I was ever pregnant, and I wanted to enjoy it."

Jess says she loaded up on mac and cheese and other crap that's delicious but terrible for you ... because "I didn't realize [the weight] didn't all come off with the baby."

Of course she didn't.

Now, Simpson is working out with a fancy Hollywood trainer ... but refuses to go running because she doesn't want to end up with two self-induced black eyes ...saying, "My boobs are way too big to run at this point."

Despite all the fatness, Simpson is committed to revealing her new, skinnier, Weight-Watchers assisted body on September 10 ... on Katie Couric's new show. Can't wait.

Unlike the bloodless vampire she plays on screen, 24-year-old "Twilight" star Nikki Reed showed off her sexy tan in Hawaii this weekend ... wearing a smoking hot bikini while on a stroll with her husband.

(Fun fact: Nikki's husband is former "American Idol" contestant Paul McDonald, who placed 8th on Season 10.)

Supermodel Bar Refaeli showed off all of her ridiculously amazing talents in a sexy two-piece swimsuit on the beach in Mykonos this weekend.

Two months after announcing the end of her relationship with Johnny Depp, French singer/actress Vanessa Paradis soaked her sexy bones in a black bikini while vacationing in Corsica the other day.

In June, Vanessa and Johnny split up after 14 years -- and having two children -- together.

You'd think Kate Upton could NEVER walk down the street without being noticed -- but she actually did a pretty bang-up job of hiding her curves in NYC. Damn sports bras!

The 42-year-old "Magic Mike" hunk was joined on vacation by his gorgeous pregnant bikini-clad wife Camila Alves.

The sexy couple look belly happy to be expecting their third child.

We can all thank Madonna for Octomom's topless album cover ... because the mother of 14 says the pop icon inspired her to bare it all for her music.

As TMZ first reported, Octo is releasing a single with reality TV star Adam Barta -- but they've changed the title of the song from "Get on the Dance Floor" to "Sexy Party."

Sources close to Octo tell TMZ ... the cover art for "Sexy Party" is 100% Madonna inspired. We're told the pop singer's "Like a Virgin" style and need to sing about liberation struck a chord with Octo and she wanted to pay homage to that with her album art.

Sources tell us ... the crosses in the background, the rosary and even Octo baring her boobies (sans nipples) was all in honor of Madge.

Millions of 13-year-old boys' dreams are about to come true -- TMZ has learned, the 3-boob'd lady in the new "Total Recall" movie WILL be showing FULL NIPPLES ... despite the film's PG-13 rating.

People have been speculating ever since news broke Sony was rebooting the classic R-rated 1990 flick, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger -- which features a 3-boob'd prostitute who proudly shows off three naked nipples.

Now, a rep for Sony tells us, the new movie won't disappoint when it premieres at midnight -- because the revamped 3-boob'd lady will ALSO be going fully topless ... sans the nipple strip she flaunted at Comic Con this year.

It's surprising ... considering the new movie's rated PG-13 -- and this kind of nudity is rare in PG-13 movies.

But it's not unheard of -- here's a list of other famous PG-13 movies with bare boobies ... "Titanic," "The Fifth Element," "Something's Gotta Give," "Forrest Gump," and "Splash."

As for the actress who played the original triple threat -- Lycia Naff -- she's pleased by the news, telling TMZ, it's pointless to go through hours of makeup and prosthetic attachment just to leave out the "best part" ... "those little chocolatey nuggets."

Um, what she said.

Leaving little to the imagination -- and looking ridiculously sexy -- in some sort of black lace body stocking thing, supermodel Bar Refaeli tweeted a pic of her gorgeous self on the set of her latest photo shoot in London on Monday.

This is definitely worthy of an Olympic gold medal.

"2 Broke Girls" star Kat Dennings ripped a page from the Christina Hendricks guide to the red carpet ... by squeezing her gals into a very cleavage-friendly blue dress this weekend.

Dennings was trying to generate interest in her show at a media event for the Television Critics Association in Beverly Hills. Mission accomplished.

Meanwhile, here's a shot of Christina at an event back in September 2011.

Naturally, we gotta ask ...

Here is a photo of Rachel Uchitel and her bundle of joy ... along with her new daughter Wyatt.

Rachel gave birth to the kid back in May.

Motherhood never looked so perky.

While snapping pics on the beach, Melanie Griffith flashed her soft porcelain lady curves in a tasteful black bikini in Hawaii on Tuesday.

This photo of Erin Andrews in a bikini ignited another WAR in the TMZ newsroom ... after one staffer suggested parts of the ESPN reporter were simply too good to be true ... specifically, her massive boobs.

Erin took her gravity-defying twins out for a swim in Miami this weekend ... and while they're definitely spectacular, are they real??

We dug up another cleavage-baring pic from an event Erin attended in 2009 to compare ... and now we just gotta ask ...

Lindsay Lohan came out swinging to officially enter the Bounciest Boobs in Hollywood tournament -- and immediately faced the champ ... Kate Upton! Sports rule.

Former "Hills" star Audrina Patridge celebrated her 27th birthday at Wet Republic at the MGM Grand yesterday ... by donning her customary two piece outfit.

Like some parts of Audrina, seeing her in a bikini never gets old.

Former "The Hills" actress Audrina Patridge took time off from her busy schedule of wearing a bikini in L.A. ... to show off her slammin' body in a white hot bikini at the ME Cabo Hotel in Mexico yesterday.

Audrina is down in Cabo San Lucas celebrating her 27th birthday with her BMX boyfriend Corey Bohan and some family members.