J.K. Simmons I Crack The Whip ... But Don't Try It At Home

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J.K. Simmons isn't someone with whom you want to play musical chairs ... the Oscar nominated "Whiplash" star says there's only one situation where throwing furniture at people works.

Simmons is cleaning up this awards season for his role as the ball-busting Terence Fletcher in the film ... but our photog found out, he doesn't agree with his character's teaching methods.

It doesn't sound like it was inspired by any teachers he had growing up, but he thinks Fletcher's "methods" only fly in one place.

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Oscars Would You Like a Lime or Cockroach in Your Drink?

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The video was shot late last year but we're told by people who have been at the venue the conditions were unchanged as recently as 5 days ago.

We're told the Heath Dept. last inspected the Dolby in June and gave it a clean bill of health.

We contacted managers at Dolby, but so far no word back.

"Birdman" may win in the main auditorium, but The Fly wins at the bar.

Oscar Gift Bag Celebs Get $20K Gift Certificate For Mind Reading Class?!

Celebrities already have money, fame and power ... but Hollywood's elite may soon have the ability to read your mind -- at least according to the woman behind one of the weirdest Oscar gifts of all time.

The Academy Awards gift bag this year contains all sorts of expensive items -- like a train ride through the Rockies and a year's worth of All-Audi A4 rentals -- but one item stands out most ... a session for mind reading techniques worth $20K.

Olessia Kantor -- who will fly out to the celebrity's location -- tells us she'll analyze their dreams/horoscopes ... and claims she can teach famous people how to read minds.

Some of her methods may sound crazy -- like daily staring exercises, thought concentration techniques and hours of mind power training -- but has a psychic ever sounded sane?

Agents of Hollywood, you've been warned.

Madonna Isolated Grammy Vocals Leak I'm Still the Boss Bitches

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If you think Madonna is past her singing prime, think again ... and watch this leaked video of her isolated vocals from her Grammy Awards performance.

Mariah Carey, Taylor Swift and Britney Spears and others have been put on blast for their less than stellar voices once audio/video leaked of their isolated vocals.

But watch Madge sing "Living for Love" ... she's awesome.

Now if only she'd put her ass away.

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Meek Mill It's Just a Little Crack ... I Didn't Trash Glass House

Meek Mill's Grammy party guests didn't trash Justin Bieber's famous glass palace -- they merely left a few cracks, according to Mill's attorney ... but there's still a war brewing over his $10K deposit.

Mill's attorney, Richard Joseph, denies leaving the mansion -- formerly rented by Bieber -- in shambles following the epic bash on Sunday night. He says there was a minor window crack, and a few scuffs on the walls ... but nothing that would qualify as "trashing."

Sources with direct knowledge of the lease for the house tell a much different story. TMZ obtained photos that appear to back up claims the place looked like a war zone, with damage including:

- a kicked in door with shattered windows

- dead landscaping

- broken glass in the pool

- destroyed furniture and cigarette smoke damage

Joseph claims those damages were never mentioned to him, and no one raised the possibility of holding his deposit. He also points out ... his name is on the lease, NOT Meek's.

Our sources say, the leasing company is still totaling up the damage, and they intend to seek compensation.

Meek Mill Party Bieber's Glass House Trashed ... Cops Called

Meek Mill took over Justin Bieber's glass mansion for Grammy weekend and threw a party so wild ... cops had to be called and the crib was destroyed when it was all said and done.

Mill hosted the massive Grammy after-party Sunday night -- Nicki Minaj, French Montana, Khloe Kardashian, Chris Brown and Justin were at the bash ... and sources inside tell us it got crazy when a fight broke out between rival gang members.

During the melee, we're told punches and even ice sculptures were tossed -- and most of the guests fled into the street. Law enforcement sources tell us ... cops were called around 1:30 AM for loud music, and found more than 1,000 people walking around the ritzy 'hood. It took about 3 hours to clear the streets.

No arrests were made, and police never went inside the house -- which was totally trashed. We're told Justin moved out last week, and Meek moved in ... signing a 1-week lease to lock down the party location.

We're guessing he can kiss that security deposit goodbye.

Nicki Minaj I Didn't Block Birdman ... Staying Neutral in Lil Wayne Beef

Nicki Minaj did NOT diss her boss Birdman by taking sides in his battle with Lil Wayne -- TMZ has learned the Cash Money CEO's denial from her pre-Grammy party was just a case of bad timing.

Sources close to Minaj tell us ... Birdman was only denied from 1OAK nightclub because the mogul's posse was looking to order bottle service, and the club was closing in 15 minutes.

On top of that, we're told Nicki had already left and the houselights were on in the club.

Sources tell us Nicki -- as well as Drake -- have made a point to stay out of the ongoing legal beef between Weezy and Baby ... even though Wayne says he's taking them with him when he leaves Cash Money.

We're told Nicki and Drake are hoping their bosses can squash this before it gets too messy -- though that ship seems to have sailed long ago.

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Magic Johnson Don't Be a Crybaby, Kanye ... Friends Can't Always Win

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Memo to Kanye West from Magic Johnson: Quit whining at award shows -- it's NOT always about your friends taking home EVERY trophy!

Magic was out in NYC today when we asked him about Kanye dissing Beck's Grammy win for Best Album -- and he dished out some sound advice ... which we're guessing Yeezy will totally ignore.

Still, MJ added ... Kanye's basically a "good guy" who just flies off at the mouth sometimes.

The NBA legend also sounded off about the Lakers' celeb fans possibly jumping ship.

Check out the vid. Unlike Kanye ... nothing rattles the Magic man.

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Giuliana Rancic Head Turner at Grammys

Giuliana Rancic hit the red carpet at the Grammys and everyone noticed.

The TV host hobnobbed with celebs before the show. Saturday, she tweeted about a pre-Grammy feast, saying, "Tons of sushi and finishing off an entire bread pudding. #dinnerofchampions #whateverittakes."

Kanye West When I Insinuated Beck Wasn't a Real Artist I Meant ...

Kanye West now says he was not suggesting Beck wasn't a "real artist" when he ranted an ultimatum that "real artists" might boycott the Grammys .. but it sure sounds like that's what he was saying.

Kanye, Kim and North West arrived in NYC Monday and he insisted he was not disrespecting Beck when he jumped on stage after Beyonce lost to the singer for Album of the Year.

But Kanye went on E! after the Grammys and said, "All I know is if the Grammys want real artists to keep coming back they need to stop playing with us," adding Beck should have given his Grammy to Beyonce.

The good news ... Kanye has gone from stone-cold silence to a talking machine.

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Kanye West Imma Let You Finish Beck, But ...

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Kanye West was really pumped up for Beck's big Grammy win Sunday night ... so much so, he almost relived his famous Taylor Swift moment from the 2009 Video Music Awards.

Beyonce lost the album of the year award to Beck, but before the singer could accept ... Kanye appeared out of nowhere to seemingly defend the diva's honor once again.

This time, things played out much differently.

And to prove things have changed ... Kanye even chatted at the show with T. Swift.

Madonna Ass Cheeks Out ... Squeeze 'Em Easy!

Madonna's ass probably couldn't make it in a Nicki Minaj video these days ... but that's not stopping her from exposing it like it's 1992 again.

The 56-year-old arrived at Staples Center for the Grammys in a sexy matador outfit, and decided to get medieval on photogs -- by hiking up her dress and showing off her aging cheeks.

Later on stage, her butt took on a bunch of half naked masked men with horns.

She keeps getting older, but her ass is ... also getting older. She just hides it well.

Pats' Malcolm Butler SUPER NERVOUS ... During Grammys Cameo

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More than 100 MILLION people watched him in the Super Bowl ... and he was calm under pressure.

But New England Patriots hero Malcolm Butler got super nervous last night at the 2015 Grammys when he and Julian Edelman presented one of the awards ... with less than 1/3 of the audience watching.

Don't get us wrong -- we love the guy ... but you could feel his nerves through the TV (deep breath man!!!).

Meantime, Julian Edelman's right ... Josh Duhamel does look like Tom Brady.

Fun Fact -- Duhamel was the QB of his college football team ... but instead of going to the NFL, Josh went to dental school.

Birdman DENIED at Nicki Minaj Pre-Grammy Party

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Birdman and his very big crew were turned away from Nicki Minaj's pre-Grammy party in West Hollywood early Sunday, and cops raced over to make sure things didn't get out of hand.

There's talk Nicki is going to bail on Birdman's Cash Money and follow Lil Wayne, so the fact that the mogul was sent walking seems like a big deal. He showed up at 1:45 AM and the club is supposed to close at 2, and you hear a guy at the door tell Birdman's posse the club was already closed.

At the same time, there was a good 15 minutes left and Birdman's kind of a big deal, and that may be why you hear someone say that Nicki didn't want him in.

Either way ... he didn't get in.

Grammy Parties Shooting Near Club One Dead

Someone was shot to death near a pre-Grammy party Saturday night.

It happened next door to Supperclub in Hollywood, and the joint was filled with rappers, including DJ Paul and based on social media it looks like Snoop Dogg, Schoolboy Q and Wiz Khalifa were also there.

Two guys got into an argument near the club, shots rang out and one person lay mortally wounded in the street. The man was shot in the head and died at the hospital.

Cops tell us it looks like both men involved in the fight were affiliated with gangs. At this point, there's no evidence that the suspect or victim were patrons of Supperclub.

As for Saturday's incident ... cops have a suspect in custody.

Tila Tequila Farrah Can Have My Porn Award ... I'm a Mom Now

And the AVN Award for Best Celebrity Sex Tape ... does not go to Farrah Abraham -- but her cakes might take the cake anyway, since the actual winner Tila Tequila would rather be Mommy of The Year.

Tila won the trophy last weekend for her Shakespearean effort in "Tila Tequila 2: Backdoored and Squirting" -- but she tells us she'd be happy to give it to Farrah ... who clearly wanted it more.

During the award ceremony, the former "Teen Mom" mistakenly stood up as Tila was named the winner -- but Tila, who squeezed out a baby girl in November ... says she'd rather be known as a great mom than for great anal.

No word if the "Backdoor Teen Mom" will accept Tila's offer, but we're sure she's got a place to put it.