Amanda Bynes Twitter Rants

It didn't take Amanda Bynes long to launch a new rambling rant ... accusing her father of sexual assault again, and announcing plans to get out of her conservatorship.

Friday morning, Bynes tweeted she plans to go to court today to get control of her life ... and her money. She also said, "The police filed a report against my dad - I am not able to be in the same room with him. He is a sexual predator and he SHOULD BE IN JAIL."

TMZ broke the story ... Bynes was sprung from the psychiatric facility where she had been held for more than two weeks ... and was spotted roaming around Sunset Blvd. on Thursday night.

Amanda Bynes is getting married ... according to a bunch of blogs. But we found out ... it's all news to the guy to whom she's supposedly getting hitched.

According to various reports ... Amanda's tying the knot with 19-year-old Caleb Pusey (relax, it's French) ... a guy with whom she got close while they were in rehab ... but sources close to Caleb tell us it's absolutely not true.

We're told Caleb and Amanda DID befriend each other ... but he says they never dated much less set a date. In fact ... he says he hasn't spoken with Bynes in months.

The brother and sister of Amanda Bynes have lashed out at her for attacking their dad and accusing him of physical and sexual abuse.

Jillian O'Keefe and Tommy Bynes tell TMZ through their lawyer, Tamar Arminak, "We are disturbed beyond words that Amanda would come up with such a fabrication as a way to avoid getting much needed help or treatment."

Amanda went on the warpath against her dad Friday after she learned her parents were coming to NYC to get her into a mental health facility, tweeting her dad had sexually and physically abused her ... something her dad vehemently denies.

Jillian and Tommy are right behind their father, calling their parents "the most wonderful parents who have ever lived."

8:51 A.M. PDT -- The lawyer for Bynes' parents -- Tamar Arminak -- is responding to Amanda's tweets, telling TMZ ... "My clients are heartbroken by these false accusations. Their older children are also horrified at the situation."

Lynn Bynes denies her husband ever abused Amanda or any of their children, saying "Rick has been the best father and husband a family can ask for." She adds, "These allegations stem from Amanda's mental state at the moment. They have no basis in reality."

Amanda Bynes is fleeing New York City after learning her parents were planning to go to NYC to get her in a mental health facility ... TMZ has learned.

We're told Bynes first went to LaGuardia to get out of town but was ordered out of the Airport after screaming at a ticket agent. She was agitated that a flight wasn't immediately leaving. She then jumped in a car to make her way to JFK.

Our sources say ... Amanda's parents have been trying to reason with their daughter to get help for her condition, but Amanda has refused. We're told Amanda's parents had already made plans to put her in a specific facility and had reserved a room, provided they could get their daughter on board.

Amanda is now on the warpath against her dad, saying on Twitter, "He called me ugly as a child." She goes on to make an unsubstantiated sexual misconduct accusation.

She also says, "My dad was verbally and physically abuse (sic) to me as a child."

So far ... Amanda's parents can't find her.

Amanda Bynes secretly wants to be just like Miley Cyrus ... at least in the grill department ... so says the man hired to construct her gangster bling, Ben Baller.

Ben is the artist making Amanda's mouth piece -- which he says cost her $10,000 -- and recently Instagrammed a mold of the actress' chompers. So when our pap saw him out in NYC ... he HAD to ask ... what was it like working with crazy the future rapper?

Ben says it was a trip -- watch the video -- he goes into detail about her nutty behavior.

But more shocking ... Ben also revealed Amanda's number one request for her grill, explaining how she wanted it to be just like Miley Cyrus'. Interesting considering Amanda previously blasted Cyrus on Twitter as "Ugly."

Talk about a 180.

Amy Schumer wants Method Man to Wu her Tang ... seriously.

The Comedy Central star was at LAX recently -- where she seemed shocked by her meteoric surge in fame -- but still took time to talk to TMZ about vaginal homicide ... a la Amanda Bynes.

Miley Cyrus says it's "impossible" that she's more than friends with Justin Bieber ... despite the public flirting ... 'cause she's currently engaged to someone else.

Miley called in to Hot 99.5 in D.C. this morning ... and actually responded when the DJ asked if the photos on TMZ showing Miley and Bieber flirting in public this weekend prove they're "more than friends."

Her response: "I'm ENGAGED!" she said, chuckling. "I'm engaged. That is impossible."

It's an interesting statement for two reasons -- first, it clears up the rumors that she broke things off with Liam Hemsworth.

Second, when it came to being more than friends with Justin ... her answer isn't exactly a strong "no."

Miley was also asked about Amanda Bynes -- and she says some interesting stuff.

Give it a listen.

Formerly troubled "Terminator 3" star Nick Stahl has some invaluable words of advice for Amanda Bynes ... if she wants to turn her life around, she should start by pulling the plug on her crazy Twitter account.

Stahl -- who famously struggled with drugs, alcohol and other personal issues in the last year -- tells TMZ Amanda's habit of constantly chronicling her every waking move isn't healthy ... and she should spend her time reconnecting with friends and family instead.

But Stahl's still optimistic, adding, "She'll figure it out. She's young."

Amanda Bynes followed through on her promise to get her nose fixed after seeing it in her mug shot ... and she tells TMZ she already wants to get another procedure ... ASAP.

In one of her post-arrest Twitter rants, Bynes said she was planning on "getting in shape and getting a nose job!"

Bynes -- who previously copped to having a nose job weeks before her arrest -- tells TMZ she got the procedure done yesterday in Manhattan and explains, "I have no bandage on. It's healing on it's own like my doctor asked."

But she's not stopping there, telling us, "I'm getting one more in 3 weeks, they are short amazing surgeries done while I'm awake but under general anesthesia. It's almost perfect."

She says once her nose "doesn't look so awful in photos" she will stop hiding from the paps.

Amanda Bynes has a serious addiction and TMZ has learned she just got herself another fix -- no, we don't mean drugs ... we're talking WIGS.

Bynes recently placed an order from Couture Princess Wigs for three Disney-inspired wigs -- one Cinderalla, one Barbie, and one Belle. She placed the order the day of her arrest and three wigs cost her a total of $830.00 (that includes shipping).

Amanda Bynes is ADAMANT ... photos taken at a trampoline facility last night in Buffalo, NY are NOT her -- but multiple witnesses think the woman DEFINITELY was the alleged bong-chucker.

It's pretty bizarre ... pics surfaced of Amanda wearing a brown wig at the upstate Sky Zone ... and she went BANANAS on Twitter, cussing out bloggers who posted them.

"THAT'S NOT ME!" she tweeted, adding: "I've never been to SkyZone! That looks nothing like me!"

But TMZ spoke with several Sky Zone employees and patrons -- and they're 100% convinced it was her. What's more ... Amanda left a paper trail.

"Amanda had to sign a waiver," Sky Zone owner Rhonda See tells TMZ. "She has the same DOB and same tattoos ... she checked in using her middle name and same last name. She did not use 'Amanda.'"

Witnesses say Amanda was disheveled, frantic and distracted when she arrived around 7:15PM, asking guests to delete pictures and bumbling around during the tutorial.

"She wasn't really listening," fellow patron Christopher Zukas tells TMZ. "She kept leaving the group to go set stuff down and would come back. During the jumping she wasn't able to follow the rules and was even knocked over by a fitness instructor teaching a class."

Other witnesses say she calmed down after 20 minutes and happily bounced for about an hour -- seemed to be having fun -- then left in a waiting car.

Amanda got pretty detailed in her Twitter rant/denial ... going so far as to assert: "I don't own a brown wig!"

Just one little problem with that story ...

Despite all the craziness ... and the wigs ... and the legal drama, David Spade says he still sees Amanda Bynes for who she really is -- a hot piece of ass.

Spade was hangin' at The Improv last night with his "Grown Ups 2" co-star Nick Swardson -- when Dave dropped some serious truth bombs about the ongoing Bynes saga.

"I'm scared of Amanda Bynes," Spade said ... joking that she'll call him "ugly" on Twitter if he says anything unflattering about her.

But Spade did rank Amanda's hotness -- and it's obvious, he's a fan.

"If you cut out all the 'stuff,' ... she's technically, for all intents and purposes, very pretty -- but I think she's getting in her own way."

Amanda Bynes straight up LIED when she accused an NYPD officer of "slapping" her vagina during last week's bong arrest ... this according to cops.

After Bynes made the allegation on Twitter this weekend, the NYPD says it launched an internal investigation to see if there was any truth to Amanda's claim.

But NYPD Deputy Commissioner Paul J. Browne tells TMZ ... "Investigators have found no evidence to corroborate Ms. Bynes's allegations."

"To the contrary," Browne says ... "a credible civilian witness who was with the officers throughout told investigators that none touched Ms. Bynes inappropriately or otherwise engaged in misconduct at any time."

Amanda Bynes is now claiming the tweets bashing Rihanna (pardon the pun) did not come from her and were actually mocked up by someone else ... then she went on to say some other crazy stuff.

Bynes went on another rambling Twitter run this afternoon, in which she says, "I saw a bunch of mocked up tweets about me bashing Rihanna in my mentions. I'm followed by so many people that someone is always mocking up fake tweets so I feel the need to address them!"

From there she goes on to say ... well, your guess is as good as ours:

"That's one of the mocked up images, they took photos of me from outside and morphed them onto someone else's body. I am allergic to marijuana and alcohol but I smoke tobacco. Why does Rihanna smoke weed and not get in trouble for it but I smoke tobacco and people think I'm on drugs? I refuse to be treated like someone I'm not, which is why I fought for myself and am suing everyone involved. I don't need to go to rehab. There is never a drug or alcohol in my system! I'm sick of all the lies! What would you do if someone accused you of things you didn't do and yet you still had to be in jail at all over it! I'm so offended but I am so educated that I know cops cannot illegally enter my apartment, sexually harass me, arrest me, take me to a MENTAL HOSPITAL, then lock me up for a crime I didn't commit. I'm suing them all for this upsetting nightmare. My lawyer knows I'm a model citizen who doesn't partake in drugs. He's going to court this week to set the record straight again on my behalf. Thankfully I'm an educated multi-millionaire who knows better than to speak to perverted unjust cops without my lawyer."

Amanda Bynes says she is planning to unleash a hailstorm of lawsuits against the NYPD and her apartment complex ... all over her arrest earlier last week ... or as she puts it, her "mistaken arrest."

Bynes just went on another glorious Twitter rampage, saying she plans to file a lawsuit against the NYPD for:

-- "Illegally entering my apartment"
-- "Lying about drugs on me"
-- "Lying about me tampering with non existent drug paraphernalia"
-- "Being put into a mental hospital against my will"
-- "Then locked up overnight for coming home after a facial and working out with my trainer like the good girl that I am."

Bynes also claims she's allergic to drugs and alcohol and is "proud to not be a drug or alcohol user."