V. Stiviano -- Sounds of Total Delusion ... I Made the Clippers Famous!!

Chris Paul and Blake Griffin would be nobodies today, if it weren't for V. Stiviano -- that is just ONE of the beyond-absurd hallucinations she's spewing.

Donald Sterling's former alleged mistress said, "No one even knew the Clippers existed until I came into the franchise" ... while appearing on the #DateFails podcast hosted by Kate Quigley and Stephen Kramer Glickman.

Her comments are just ridiculous enough to be entertaining. Take a listen ... nothing like a little crazy talk to spice up your Friday.