Shhh! Another Rare Species Spotted on Melrose!
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Nature buffs were both delighted and terrified yesterday, when the extremely rare, red-orbed celebutwin species, Mary-Katenus Olsenicus, often confused with the Ashleyus, was seen perched near some statuary outside of the Maxfield store on Melrose Ave. yesterday. The skittish breed is unusual in that it gathers shiny bits of random string and metal to adorn itself.
This rail-like, camera-shy example is also remarkable for its unusual high-booted feet, black lacquered talons, and fierce scowl.