Jacko in the Box

Nothing thrills a jaded former fan quite like a vintage doll. Lucky day, eBay has a European auction for a Michael Jackson HIStory doll, still sealed in its box.

Dressed in black and white, and complete with that creepy arm brace thing he was wearing in the 90s, this doll is sure to warm the cockles of hearts that remember the days before Neverland search warrants, putty noses, and dangling children named Blanket.

Now your child can finally play with Michael, worry-free.